When had a bad day...

Oha my space. It's a holiday morning but here I am naturally waking up at the usual morning time. I guess yesterday's incident brought me to be even more moody. But I'm keeping it inside me and trying to stay calm and pretend nothing has happened. Still, mr brain failed me and keep thinking about it. Here this just feel as though I can't make a single mistake or it'll be broadcast around. 😱 I was in disbelief. I felt so misunderstood. But who will think in my shoes right? It was the first time it happened to me. I don't think it's appropriate to tell anyone cos this felt like a stab to me. Okay, so my fault for being muddle-headed at times.. but I didn't wish for this to happen! Recently I've been even more forgetful. I have no idea why for one second when I think of something I can forget it the very next moment!! This has never happened before either! It felt so scary now.....that if I were to be so unsure of myself again I might face another one to upset me. With once I certainly had enough of it. ☹ Probably everyone are guessing too, and maybe my co-worker beside would have guessed it if she were to notice me. Although I shouldn't be thinking so much to leave myself feeling so horrible. But all of this is possible. I'm just..... starting to feel detached from this place. I really wonder if I can ever befriend anyone in the workplace. 😦 

In addition, there's actually a big blood clot at the bottom of my tongue. I must have got it a few times in my life but it was just last night I took a closer look at the mirror because it was bothering me while I'm eating. It's so strange something at my tongue keep brushing against my teeth and it kinda hurts. A while later I tasted blood. Where did it all come from??! I have no idea how the clot just came when I didn't feel any pain earlier on. 😭

Pain from work, pain from body, pain from relationships. This has gone far at such a wrong time.

If only I can return to sleep and pretend none of these has happened.

But I'm awake too soon to recall those. 🤕 I need to find myself again. 🙀