My New Chapter too..

I haven't been talking about Michelle Phan in a while. Her recent video made me so relaxed and inspired once again. I love how when I'm feeling kinda troubled and her video seems to appear at the right time, making me feel better after that. (^_^)





Get in touch with your own beauty and flaws. It's the combination of the two that makes us all unique. 

She's definitely the best inspirational artiste that I have come across, constantly giving her all and inspiring people from time to time. I feel that I can keep learning from her even until now, instead of the Jpop queen who used to inspire me. Well then, things change and human change too. But I always believe in changing for the better. I shall talk about this some other time then, since I still need time to get things sorted out. （・□・；）

What's even more wonderful than getting reply from your favourite artiste? I love when this happens and I will definitely capture such a moment. It's nice cos this made me feel closer to her than the queen. Oops, I mentioning it again. (>_<)

Anyway, I wasn't into the makeup look lowkey baddie where Mish replied me in. Probably cos I dislike that sort of colour on the lip and nails so the whole look seems plain to me. But I really like her braided hair! I would love to do my hair like this someday and hope it suits me. I don't have enough hair and so it's hard for me to do braids now. I'm still in the midst of trying out the scalp treatment and I wonder will it take me 2 or 3 months to finish the whole bottle. Lol. I noticed some baby hairs growing so I consider this as a slight improvement for now. I hope it works well for me but it's gonna take time to see the results. I can feel the stinging sensation from the second time I used it. I guess that's cos I began to be more liberal in pouring the amount of the liquid to my head lol. But then again, my hair falls quite a bit after I massage the liquid into my scalp. I'm feeling kinda troubled to see this, cos it seems my scalp just doesn't accept products that easily. I don't know what else to do but I think I wanna continue using it and see how it goes. Moreover it takes freaking long time for hair to grow. I need to be patient throughout this period. I need to have all this time to myself more. (>ω<)


By the way I'm happy to see Mish appearing in the newspaper on 17 November last year!

Although Mish hasn't been doing as much makeup tutorials as before, I'm actually fine with it. Moreover her other videos like Pillow talk and New chapter brings us closer too. And her DIY videos seems fun! I love how she's teaching us things in other ways. I still miss her makeup tutorial videos as always but I'm totally supporting her for whatever she does cos I can always gain something from her every time. I remembered a friend of mine who told me she isn't surprised about what Mish is doing cos by now Mish should already be running out of ideas for makeup long ago. Lol. Maybe so, but I think makeup is an endless creation. There are lots of different looks that one can come up with and it changes throughout the years along with the development of products. I don't mind re-watching some of her old videos again but I also believe Mish is still constantly working on creating more looks. I know she wouldn't stop making videos as she used to say that before and that's what she's happy with doing. And that's why all the more I'm so proud to be a dreamer. +.*☆( ˘ω˘ )☆*.+

Knowing who you are by expressing who you are on the outside so that people can see you.

You need to love yourself so you'll exist!! Although it takes time for me but I'm slowly able to find my way of expression and I can identify myself more this time. It's through Michelle Phan that my interest in makeup and skincare grow. During those times where I know nothing about the facial products, have bad skin, lack of confidence and not focusing on the right things. Now I became a better and confident person not just on the outside but also on the inside with regards to who I am.

Thank U Mish for teaching me so much~ (⌒‐⌒)


I will focus more on myself this year and continue to do what I love.  Let's always be strong. ♥

I need to be revived!

I enjoyed Michelle Phan's pillow talk and I'm glad that she's doing more of this!






Point to note:
Failure invites change.
Feeling isolated is only temporary.
Inspiration ignites passion, jealousy ignites insecurity.
Time separates memories.

I've been thinking about what she's saying, and then looking at myself... and then wondering about my current life. (・_・) Not that I'm not happy with it, I always thought I should be doing more. But what have I achieved? How have I changed? How has things been going? It has been the same isn't it? Is that good? How can I change that? How should it be? What's the best way for me? What does everyone think now? Do I fit in? Did I done what I should have? Is this where I should be?

Why do I have so many questions suddenly!! What was I fretting about?  (,_,) 

Maybe work gets a bit too heavy recently, that I have been working till a little late since the long holidays last week does affect and brought a lot of work that has to be done. I'm feeling a little guilty from time to time when I'm unable to accomplish them for the day, but then continuing them when I couldn't think properly would make it worse maybe. And I hate to make mistakes cos it resulted in more work to correct them. (-_-)

And also, I have to focus on important things that made me unable to attend activities like I used to, I feel like I'm gonna miss out a lot on my social life. (T_T)

Probably what troubles me is that I'm unable to manage them all and have enough rest. Good grief.


I hope I'm conscious enough too that it doesn't cost my health cos I've been feeling not quite in the zone lately. I'm starting to lose enthusiasm for some thing...  。・°°・(＞_＜)・°°・。


SO! I need to be revived!

Maybe I need to meditate to get rid of all thoughts!! و(¯―¯٥)


Back to talking about my passion: One thing that I'm kinda surprised is to see Michelle mentioning about looking into engineering for origami! That hasn't crossed my mind although I love origami quite a lot. Now I'm starting to miss it cos I have lots of origami paper with me I bought so much from Daiso years ago but I haven't got the mood to fold them for a very long time!! I miss this little hobby of mine. I looked back at my old posts and I realised the last I did was 3 years ago. [Not including the paper cranes in 2013] I was wondering if I should throw those away cos I didn't get to use those at all. Well are origami products of any use by the way? Lol. (^_^); They are....probably just for me to admire my little effort during my free time. That's sad. Hmph...


For once, I probably need to revive my hobby back. I need to do more.


But then,

I do need to heal my heart, the most.~ ♥

Loving myself~

Michelle Phan is being ever so inspiring and make me feel so comforted after watching it. Glad that there's another intimate talk again. ヽ(・∀・)ノ



I love the deep questions that she came up with in asking yourself [including to look at yourself in the mirror ^_^;]

Am I happy? Am I in the right relationship? Is this where I want to be in life? Am I doing what I love? Do I feel loved? Am I loving myself?

The key thing is really to maintain positive thoughts. I totally agree. =)

I'm beginning to be more sure of myself recently, and able to have the answers to those questions for myself. I'm glad that now I can be able to think clearly, and develop myself more and not wasting time. Because I'm able to have a direction now, I'm no longer lost. And it also comes from within, to know what you wanna do in life. I guess it's really important to take some time out to think about your life and future. I've always wanted a place where I belong, know where I stand, and how important I am to everyone. It feels so good now that I've got the answers.

And so, I'm loving myself more now. I truly happy. （＾∇＾）

Self-love is important. If you wanna build self-confidence, it really comes from inside. It's like planting a seed.

You can change the way you look at things. Because the things that you look at, will change. Doing positive things will have a positive reaction on others.

It's also through time that I realised I have influence on the people around me too. I didn't think that I was good in any way to have an positive impact on others. What am I capable of? What can I do for others? But the thing is, little actions do mean a lot. Every single move and things that I've said are actually sinking into their minds. One day, I can see it in them. And I feel so comforted when I know about it.

Life is too short to be negative. And yes, I have been exuding positive energy lately. (☆∀☆)

I'm glad that I can make the people around me happy. I do have the power. (*'▽'*)♪ I shouldn't belittle myself anymore.

I'm pretty sure, I'm being loved. ♥


"There's gonna be someone out there, that loves you, for you" ~Mish.

Thank you, Michelle. Thanks so much~! ^_^

I'm a confident dreamer~~

Yeah I'm so happy that Michelle Phan actually replied me last night when it was just a random thought that I have after watching her video. It was interesting for Michelle to use horoscopes as the idea for some fun and a little makeup tutorial. I like the temporary tattoo and the shoes they decorated them! It made me have a sudden urge to do that to my shoes too. It's cool that you can make them unique, and to receive compliments for such. (≧▽≦) Let's see if I'm able to do anything like that. haha.

And from now on, I'm gonna call myself a dreamer. hehe.  （＾∇＾）

I just made myself recall this post Swoozie replied my comment and even favourited my tweet while I'm blogging now. Yeah so coincidentally I was about to talk about the topic on self confidence, again. Lol.

I have been thinking lately, that I do need confidence and cos this is what most people expects out of me. While they have confidence in me, I don't really have the same amount that they have of me. Just how much confidence do I need to be okay? And how can I secure that?

But really, low confidence that I have in myself seems to spoil things for me. lol. It seems that most people wants me to appear like that so that they can rest assured of the things that they put me in charge with. Of course I am someone dependable and I keep my words. But just that I'm worried that if I'm not up to the job or at their expectations and letting the people around me disappointed is something I hate to happen. So that's why, I have been trying hard to see how can I change that. Most probably is my way of thinking then.

Well of course not that I wanna fake the confidence cos that's what they want out of me. I do need confidence so that I can perform well too. If I think I can't, most probably I really can't since I would be worrying so much already. [Stop the 'What if' questions!] I really can't deny myself, anything of myself cos this makes things worse isn't it?

And so, I have to be very sure of myself. That's what I've concluded that I should be after reading a little about self confidence. I guess the best way is to work hard and be knowledgeable [after all]. Of course, this also includes being a positive person. Not afraid of anything, not undervaluing your capabilities, and having the strong sense of belief in yourself.

Confident people has the power to influence people too. I always hope that I can attain that. The idea seems far, but the fact that I can inspire some of my friends is something I feel proud too. I didn't expect/think that I can have a positive impact on anyone, but since that happens, it feels really good. I feel so worthy. Lol.


Therefore I probably have to consistently tell myself that "I'm really a worthy person. I am talented and capable like what most people think of me."  (-^〇^-) Cos that would make me achieve and succeed in the things that I wanted to do.  Yeah, that's it! Stop thinking and worrying too much!!


Well then, I also hope that I can be in an environment where it forces me to be strong, and as a result be confident. It sounded kinda tough, but let's see if that could happen... Now I just need to focus on what I wanted to do. ＼＼\(۶•̀ᴗ•́)۶//／／


The only thing that I don't want is to let anyone down. That's all. 

Even Isshi's coach told me so, that Isshi won't be disappointed in me.

And he won't because he knows that I will work hard. =)

Cheesie comment, birthday

It was one of my favourite inspirational blogger's birthday on 2nd April. I went to comment on Cheesie's blog since I've always been a passive reader and have not comment in a very long time. I love her blog content mostly featuring Japanese food and lovely places. I love to see how she updates so often despite being a mum. And of course, her sense of humour is really good too. xD

I'm glad that my message get across to her. I think I should probably leave more comments about my thoughts and not be a silent reader most of the time. It's good to let the person know how great an impact he/she has on you, and also to make them happy for what they've done so that they'll continue doing well. I'm also glad at some point I do leave message to people I appreciate and can be able to befriend them. At least they would know that there's people like me who is sincerely grateful and looking forward to their efforts? If it were me, I would also love to receive comments on how my lyric/translation work is and improve in some way. lol.

Speaking of birthdays, yes I'm having the same thoughts as Cheesie. Not that I can't be bothered about it, I just don't mind that there's no celebration going on. It's probably much better to be happy every single day of your life rather than just a day out of 365 days in the year. Probably it's a day when you can feel like a queen, you can have many wishes, you can receive lots of presents, you can have the attention for the entire day, you feel that you are the most important person in the world at this time....

But it doesn't matter to me anymore.

I'd rather be thankful and be loved at any time. I don't need all that simply on a particular day. I want to be satisfied with my life just as it is. I don't want to be disappointed if the above things did not happened on my birthday itself. Whatever for, right? Why should I only look forward to that day? Why should I restrict myself to only have a day of happiness? lol.

Maybe I've gotten older and wiser too. (^_^;) I just don't mind that it's a day like any other ordinary day, even if no one wishes me. I could have gotten a cake for myself and eat it like I want to. xD I don't need pin on hopes on anyone to treat me nicely on that day itself. I can also love myself and 'celebrate' it in a way I like. I can pamper myself just like any other time. Or maybe just be happy with the way it is, whether I have school or work. Laugh or cry for whatever happens..

It's really better this way. Because this made me feel so much relieved now. I don't need to fret over it anymore. And the best moments that happened in my life don't fall on my birthday anyway. lol.  ♪～(´ε｀　)

So this year... I shall not remind myself of that day anymore I hope. Hahaha. (≧▽≦)

~~~~~
I've recently done Michelle Phan's Survey in which I'm also glad that she created it and wanna listen to us! Well for me I would love to see her continue what she does best in makeup tutorials and also some inspirational videos like Pillow talk. Oh, I also wanna see her doing tutorials in drawing anime characters since she's really good at drawing. That would be the best!

Oh yes, and I'm glad that she released a makeup book quite some time ago. But I'm currently kinda tight to spend on it now. ~$35 for a book! Everytime I passed by the book store I just forgot I could buy it when there's discounts going on. Alright, never mind. I will get my hands on it someday. haha.


I will try to be more active and hardworking too~ （・□・；）

I'm so out of this world~

I began to have this feeling that I didn't have for a super long time..

When I'm surrounded with certain people...I feel I was sort of there for nothing.

But yet my presence still mean something. That's what I was told. I feel comforted at some point. But still I wasn't sure of myself, where I stand...

Does that matter a lot? Do I have to go that far to impress everyone? Or is it that there is still this barrier in me and that's why I'm unable to have the attention I wanted to?

Seems like I still can't get over some things...... (>_<)


Have watched Michelle Phan's Pillow talk which made me feel good about this little intimate talk. THIS is inspirational and comforting. (￣▽￣)



"Boredom inspire new ideas.
This is the moment [alone time] where you can really develop and become the person you will be in the future"

I love what she said. So I should be getting myself having more ideas and inspiration to do all that I want when I can right now.♥♥


Aww and the dreamcatcher at the back of her room! Reminds me that I have one earlier this year.  (^_^) Maybe I should stop all the thinking and worrying but to dream more instead? lol.


Dream and become the person I want to, not for anyone but myself.

I should just be in my own world then~

Seeking inspiration from...

I have a period of somewhat a mental block earlier on January I couldn't think nor focus on doing what I want. It was quite a horrible feeling, that I can feel I'm useless suddenly. And so, I ended up talking to a few of friends about something else, how I feel and about maybe leaving everyone else.

Damn, that was the worst thought ever! 。・°°・(＞_＜)・°°・。

Well, I couldn't take back my words. But I guessed, it's also cos that after I've expressed it, I felt better moments later. And then I could think clearer when others told me of what they think. Yes, I shouldn't be in a rash no matter what, even when it comes to telling someone how I feel. But back then I didn't have a clear mind, I can't process my thoughts, so I ended up blabbering such stuffs that I never would have want to tell them again...


Anyway, things have been going good since. Probably cos I've got over those stupid thoughts and my friends made me feel better as always, or maybe from that day onwards idk. But I wouldn't wanna look back at that time. Although I made myself somewhat able to write 2 dark songs at the start of the year. But it was really a painful process I have been through. I wonder why it turned out to be like this. Is it because of someone who has caused me pain unknowingly? And that my inspiration couldn't come when I need it. It was hurting me deep inside I guess. (ó﹏ò｡)

My mood was certainly affected, and that's not a good thing cos I'm unable to do anything well cos of that. It's only that after listening to Kagrra, music I felt better. Much that I wished that certain things shouldn't happened to lead to this of me, somehow I think it made me grow. And be more conscious of myself. Don't keep thinking about doing things for others. I should think for myself too.

While I'm having complicated thoughts all over again.... (x_x)


Anyway, I've gotten back my inspiration to do the things that I like. Of course, lyrics wise I'm inspired by isshi now. But for fashion, beauty, life and everything else to learn from:

• Ayu → Been her fan since 2003. It's Ayu that I'm able to live through my teenage years.
• Michelle Phan → Following her for years when I just started into makeup. First video watched is from Mish, and have been continuing ever since 2010.
• Cheesie → The most hardworking blogger I've ever seen. Now that she's an amazing mum whom I look up to and aspire to be!
• Kumicky → My most favourite Popteen model I like since 2011. She also has a great personality and works hard all the time.
• Jenn Im → A great fashionista who is really eloquent. Just by looking at her makes me happy too.


I really feel revived after looking at them! I feel that I'm back once again! ♪～(´ε｀　)


And sometimes, I just have to feel good about myself. (*˘︶˘*).｡.:*♡

No worries cos life just goes on no matter what.

The dreamer in me~~~

I love that Michelle Phan will do an inspirational video, especially at the start of the year. It makes me rethink about myself..

There are many lovely happenings that I've been dreaming of, and I've always hoped that I can achieve what I want without any worries.

Yes, I will carry on to have many wishes.. I'll never stop dreaming, cos this is what gives me the strength too.




And so coincidentally, I received this dreamcatcher as a gift from my friend. It appears in the video too~!! （＾∇＾）

Some things are just meant to be!! (^o^)☆

And my wishes will all be fulfilled, one by one..  *･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Self confidence + my tweet got favourited!

I've always love such inspiring videos from Michelle Phan! I got so comforted from watching this video:



I'll just note down whatever she mentions: （＾∇＾）
1. Confidence is a mental muscle. → Think positive thoughts. Listen to positive music.
2. Find your qualities. → Focus on the positive. You are perfectly imperfect.
3. Have a buddy system.
4. Pass your wisdom and gifts onto others. → Loving others will inspire you to love yourself.
5. Stay positive. → Be like a proton and stay positive.

If only I got to know about this earlier in my teenage years. I have been seeking perfection back then way too much that I regret for neglecting many other important things in my life. Confidence is definitely one thing that I'm lacking so much. But right now, having been through quite a lot lately, there are many things that I won't mind and I really felt much better. Been really positive towards the future. And also, some things that I'm worrying about, aren't actually as bad as I thought so. Probably it's all in my mind, partly thinking way too much. Lol. Anyway, all in all, letting go is also something to learn about. Sometimes, I really need to free myself....


So much of me doing some reflection. lol. Now for something really happy!~

Swoozie actually replied my Youtube comment!! 

Probably just a little action but I appreciate that loads cos it's not that I can get any celebrity to reply me. Haha. I'm really really glad he took notice of my comment, and even followed me and went to favourite my tweets! That's way too good!!

Swoozie, if u can even get to read my blog post on this, I would like to say again : I'm really happy for your little action and U are really awesome! Have never regretted clicking and watching your videos through Michelle Phan. Both of u are my most favourite Youtube celebrities. (●＾口＾●)

I'm glad how watching a video can make my day. （≧∇≦）

~~~~~
#Edit: And my tweet to him on this post got favourited again. Thanks much!!

Little purchase 1404

Went to buy more MJCare masks as mentioned earlier. lol. but I think I'm still missing out some flavours. Maybe I should get the Red ginseng again too and post it here with the other masks . xD

I have been using masks less often lately so I guess I have to be more diligent now. It's actually really good as a way to relax for a while. Hehe. I guess I have different obsessions from time to time.  o(^▽^)o


I was watching Michelle Phan's video on Korean skincare/cosmetics and come to know about acne patches.

Didn't even realised the ones that I've bought is the same brand as the one she mentioned at first!! Lol.

It was kinda good initially, sort of shrinks the acne. But maybe cos my problem is kinda serious so it doesn't solve that fast? I can use up to 5 at one go and it's finishing soon although I didn't use it everyday. And that is because although I can put on makeup over it, the sides or border of the patch had my foundation which is so obvious!! It says that the patch will change to white but mine didn't. Strange though. Ar~~ at least I had something to help to reduce my acne problem. Hopefully it all be gone soon. >_<

The other 2 that I find interesting is the cheek masks and smile patch. She's so funny when putting on the smile patch!! =D I might gonna try them out too, when I'm gonna step into a Korean beauty store. Haven't done shopping in such a store for some time. lol.

But I might consider again, because...


"Smile lines are good, shows that you've lived a happy life." ~Michelle Phan