Cosmos #14 | Another beginning to treat myself right!

Bless me!! I finally can make myself do a Cosmos post and feel I'm not out of this world yet! lol.

It's been such a long while, that I have the mood to document my life in this way and feel somewhat better by summing up what's been going on for the whole week.

Yeah so here's my report: I'm in a new environment for a month! And have been eating well lately, which is a huge improvement compared to August! It's weird how my body changes that quickly just because I get moving instead of resting at home. Maybe my body has accustomed to getting waking up and getting active? I wished I can make myself rest more as I know I didn't get to rest properly in ages. And it's hard to control my stomach or digestion I really don't get what's going on but since I'm back to normal this should be good. Or maybe because this is just a start so stress hasn't come to me yet? Well, the fact that I'm not facing it alone and I felt that everyone is working equally hard and being cooperative makes me feel that there is actually more morale here. We often have group lunches and gatherings which made me feel I'm part of them. This is such a huge gap I get to experience like finally! But on one hand, I'm feeling guilty from spending too much. Really too much!! Especially on food because of the gatherings. I felt kinda heart pain but on the other hand, expensive food gave me the appetite. And that is why I can eat better than before. It probably pays off in the future? And how can I not note that I always tend to spend more towards the end of the year? lol. It just so happens. But I really need to restrain a little. Although yes, I'm struggling between treating myself right and saving up a bit more for the future if not I'm cry someday if I ever need $$ in unexpected situations. ^_^; hahaha.


Well last week, I also had the mood to do a little 'craft' by changing my earrings into hp chains instead. I used them on bags or pouches with zips. Since I don't wear earrings anymore, it would be a waste if I throw them away instead of converting them for something better or useful. I like putting on chains so this is just one of my small creativity. And since I can't bear to just throw those away as the flowers and stars are really pretty you know!

So there ya go, this is my little boring life. hahahaa. (≧▽≦)


As for this week's little reward, I bought myself another of the matte lipstick, powder foundation and hair oil to stock up!

Previously I mentioned the shade was dark on me, and it's true. Now I find that the picture of a model's lip colour for the lipstick cannot be trusted [probably due to the lighting or the skin colour idk]. It's of course the best if I can try it right on my lips but I definitely won't do that since it's not hygienic. All I can do is to judge by the tube/sticker colour so this time, after I watched reviews from youtube and got to have a clearer look at the colour, I'm very pleased that I got the right shade I wanted for myself initially, which is light pastel pink. It's better because it's sweet looking and nope I don't like nudes! I don't get why it's such an in thing nowadays because it made you look sick more than anything else. Natural looking is nice but I felt it would defeat the purpose of putting a lip product on your lips when the colour doesn't show, unless it's a lip balm. Same applies to nail polish. I just can't get into nude colours so nope!!

As for the foundation, their natural shade actually seemed quite dark after I used the sponge to tap. It didn't seem to be a problem to me since it indeed is nearest to my skin colour although I think they could have made it a little lighter since it'll oxidize at the end of the day. But so far, I wasn't out for too long I don't know if it's something I'll be satisfied with yet. But nonetheless, I'm still in search of a good long lasting foundation that can control my oil well. Sadly it's been quite a challenging task. *sweats*

Beauty shall be here~

Hey there! It was a super long while since I've last blogged here. 2017 has already seem like some kind of life-changing year for me perhaps? I spent my time doing this other site writing although I'm not sure how will it help me ^_^; At least I'm still working my brain to do something I like right? Although I'm a little upset with myself how I've stopped my weekly Cosmos posts because I was so uninspired for so long. What can I say? I was actually uninspired ever since this year arrived. Well, if I have to think about it, I was too burned up (stressed up) constantly in tensed mode that I didn't realised how much damage it has already done to me but of course I made the right decision of leaving at the right time if not I might go crazy or more than that. (´；Д；｀)

Looking back at 2016, how much I love Buck Tick that I keep listening to sad songs and be so inspired by it. So here proves it, sad songs and being in sad lone mood gave me the inspiration to write. And since I wanna make myself happy and stand up with strength again, I moved to Kpop which gave me the energy indeed and so I turned out not having that lyric inspiration anymore. This is kinda strange to me in a sense. I thought I can be inspired by almost anything that I come across. Why would music genre be part of the factor? Well I don't understand myself anyway so how can I even answer that right? haha. At least I got such things figured out, so all I'm left now is to see if I can still be able to write someway or another. No force, no stress. Just do when I can. But as for now I have a lot of things to focus and learn at work, so good and bad in a sense.

Anyway, let's have some updates! I think I'm most likely gonna post my skincare and cosmetics photos here. Maybe solely here on what I've bought. (>ω<) I haven't been doing much shopping so it can't be any fun haul. But I might wanna comment how good or bad the product is that I've bought and used.

These are gifts to me from a friend! Masks, gudetama handcream and post-it & stickers. That's really sweet to receive as gifts! Especially all from Korea. ♥

Additionally, I bought myself more masks since there was a sale. And just also to make myself use them more often or else how will I be motivated if I didn't see a mountain of them that I'm supposed to use them up asap? lol~

I quite like this lip balm I bought btw. It's supposedly a new packaging? But hey it's Made-in-Japan so that pumps me up! xD  The colour is indeed very sheer but I like how it's peach gold colour as it says. I think it's pretty good as an usual everyday wear to work. Well I just don't do thick full makeup to work but rather a simple and clean look.

I wanted a matte lipstick for quite a while! Damn I'm glad I got this because it really feels like powder after application which feels smooth and comfortable to me. But I think I got the colour that was a little too HOT PINK for me? I'm not sure if it will turn out the best for me if I were to have full makeup on cos I only just tried it out. I like how the colour staying power is so awesome!! And it doesn't feel drying at all. I'm pretty surprised there can be such a good matte lipsticks around! So I might wanna get another lighter colour of it but anyway, I think I need to be bold enough to wear such a strong HOT PINK colour out and see what others think and maybe I will look really pretty. Cos I need some real colour on my lips. If it's too light it might 'defeat' the purpose of me getting a lipstick colour on my lips. (・・;)

As for the eyeshadow & primer 2-in-1, I can't comment for now since I haven't get to wear it out yet. My eyelids are as oily as my entire face skin so it's quite a trouble for me. I'll rather not apply concealer since it'll became more oily than usual if I leave it unapplied. Just wonder what's up with it. So hopefully this product may help somehow? No idea if my eyelids can stop being oily and whether it can let the eyeshadow be more longlasting and obvious.

Alright, all else I'm left with finding the best foundation for myself. Up till now there's not one that I feel the best to stop my skin from being so oily!!

The last unproductive month

How about a peek into what has happened?

Bought the pore minimizer or whatever it's called. Just because ZA is not selling it anymore and I'm really upset about it! Why don't U!! Although honestly I'm not sure if my pores and indeed smaller after using this product but I supposed it does help a little. EH was having a sale so I don't mind getting 2 bottles at one go. But it's gonna take me a real long time to finish using them though hahaha.

A surprise gift from a friend who came to my doorstep that day. It was a Saturday in which I wasn't in the mood nor able to hang out late (at the last min) so this came and brighten me up. Appreciate the thought!! Although it would be better if my friends aren't so sneaky. They always don't knock the door but quietly walk along the corridor and hang something on my door..... (-｡-;

Lastly, I painted my nails! It was purely out of good mood! I bought 2 colours at a drugstore which I didn't frequent but simply because they carry my favourite essence brand. That's all. It was kinda wasted since I won't be able to get points as a member of the other store which is not available around my area nor having essence with them again. What a sick truth. But I still can't let this stop me from pampering myself. A little trouble shouldn't bother me that much isn't it? It lasted for 3 days before it wore out without the top coat. So... definitely don't miss out putting on top coat cos it definitely helps to let the nail polish stay on longer. =/

I have nothing else to talk about May month anymore. It was a memory that kinda got slipped out of my brain very soon. If not for the photos.. >_<

Time to look forward for the better!

Take the chance to change for the better~

Here comes my once-in-a-blue-moon hair update! I splurge on my hair once again, since that became the only place where I can spend my money on without feeling guilty. Since this was my resolution, and I just have to get better to look pretty isn't it? lol.

First I have bought this hair oil months ago but I've just started using it this month. I wonder is it me who's having this new product fallacy. Every time I bought an use a new (hair) product I always feel it's better than the previous one that I've used. Okay, so what's nice about this one? It just made my hair more smoother than the previous one. OH really? (¬_¬)

How else can I describe hair oil then? Aren't they supposed to make my hair smooth and manageable? Okay, the previous one works just as well. But somehow I just feel it's just better at doing this job. It's actually meant for damage hair though, so maybe that's why it's just better than CC hair oil. I guess so. I'm satisfied with it for now. hahaha.

Because my hair looks messy with all the frizz, to be honest, no matter how much hair oil I apply to smoothen it, it look like it wants to fly. I have to comb it once every few hours (ideally) so it's actually hard to tame them down. I have a hard time with them but it's not like I hate my hair. It's much much better after I head to the salon for treatments. And my natural wavy hair just made my hair lively, just that it looks like it doesn't wanna stay like how it should.

SO! It was my hairstylist who can't tolerate my messy hair, and went to soften my hair by persuading me to let her do straightening this time. I haven't had straight hair in years and this brings back so memories though. I'm lucky that there's lotta discount for me so this was worth the price including the products I have to get. (^_-)-☆ And I have to emphasize that my hair now is indeed more manageable when it's super straight now, I don't have to comb so many times, it'll all just fall into place. Although I'm not used to it since it's been holy many years. And my fringe style totally changed. lol. Thanks stylist thanks. I have a sudden change in my image that I'm not even feeling I'm myself. Is this good? I feel like life is hinting at me that I should have some form of change.

2 more products added into my life and telling me to be more diligent to take good care of my hair. Oh the trouble of doing more things now lol. For beauty's sake, how can I slack! I better get myself to use up the scalp spray soon too. Oops. (≧▽≦)


Well then, let's see if a month later, will my hair still stay in place. And I think I've got the urge to change my hair again... =D

Cosmos #13 (Cont') | Unspoken thoughts

Let me continue about the past week. I received gifts from a friend days earlier before my day so it was a good one. And I even had a nice surprise on a Friday. I'm glad I have friends who cared, after all. But still, I haven't been able to meet one properly for a whole afternoon meal out and have lengthy chats. It feels like I'm missing out on life. On one hand, I wanna spend more time thinking about what I wanna do, and not waste too much time about socialising since, it didn't help me that much. When you're at this stage of your life, you're probably trying to figure things out badly, and your realised having a few friends is just good enough. The rest that you know of are just acquaintances waiting to see when you can be a laughing stock. The world is a harsh reality. Everyone around just wanna make comparison and see who's the winner. It's an endless game that is so unhealthy which makes you get so sick of life. What's so good about mixing around with people? Fake people? (¬_¬) I'm so tired enough of facing people. Really tire out.

I really hope to have a break or else at best live my simple life in a deserted island without having to worry much. Who cares about the money! Money is the devil! It made us so stressed up about living. I hate to make it a consideration in my life. It's so hard to get everything balanced. Everything needs money it's disgusting. I hate how we have to be bound by it. We are all struggling just to survive. I dislike living in this era. I almost dislike everything now. I hate how helpless I can get. Why are my strengths so limited? Why do I have to lead a life like that? Why do we always have to be bullied? Why do people go for what benefits them and scorn and look down on others so easily? I'm not there to see your face and keep accommodating to your nasty ways. It's so hard to do things when you don't have the position and authority. This world is sick! Humans are the source of problems. I wanna stop having angry thoughts of them which tensed me up so much. How I wished, if I can throw some eggs at some of them to vent. No but it can only appear in my thoughts. (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)


I'm so angry now that I might need to calm down. ⋋_⋌ Okay, let's just see what I've got.

As for these skincare and cosmetics stuffs, I bought them for myself though. Hehe. I was waiting to get something new for myself in a long time! But the drugstore I frequent isn't near me anymore so I have to go to another one in which I'm not a member of at all (wasted). I'm just sad that the essence cosmetics are getting lesser and harder to find. They are good and cheap brand in which I'll recommend. I love using their products and still sticking to it until now. I hope they can be here for a long time and continue doing more. I have been buying their limited editions and I still enjoy it. Made me feel so excited each time. If anyone knows me, you would have known that I'm really a fan of their cosmetics now. haha.

Yes, and time to really sit and think and do more brain exercises whatever about life.

Cosmos #13 | There are things that I wanna abandon

Good grief! Am I back alive to get this blog going?

At some point of time, I would like to stop and have a break. Or just give up altogether.

There are so many things that I wanna achieve, and yet my strengths are so limited.

I am so tired of hanging on and staying the same that I really need to push myself forward for more.

I wonder for the current direction that I am facing was right at all. But if I don't give it a shot, I will never know.

Can't believe, it's just been a while and my typing style has became quite differently. =/


On Thursday, I was kinda in the mood of getting some cosmetics for myself at a drugstore but I was stumbled by surprised where the shop I used to go got shut down and was replaced by something else instead. I was UTTERLY DISAPPOINTED. I knew for sure I shouldn't be heading down to a place intentionally just to get something. You won't know for sure if something 'bad' can happen, like the things you wanna get happened to be out-of-stock, or worse like this - the entire shop isn't around anymore. I thought it must be a mistake. I searched the web for the unit number and obviously it wasn't updated! *I'm so angry* because I walked around the entire floor to search for it. I should have trusted myself instead of wasting time because I went into the drugstore before it's not like I don't know where it is.

I ended up reaching home much later, feeling lost as to what I'm doing. I didn't expect it and I had enough of anything bad because I'm starting to hate my job and the people I face. Everyday it's slowly killing me inside.

Never have I thought this day is coming to me so soon. I'm really exhausted. T_T


When will I be allowed to truly have a break? WHEN?


To lessen my disappointment that day, I went to the Japanese snack store to grab some candies and instant latte. For whatever use. -_-

Have I got any happier?

As you could have guessed, I didn't even touch those 2 yet. I wasn't that enthusiastic anymore.

I need someone to listen to me and let me lead a life of my own.

But what can happen this soon? =(

Cosmos #12 | Time to treat myself right!

So... I know I'm starting not to be blogging as regular as before. Well, things happen and priorities changes each time. While I do miss blogging here, there are times where I feel I have mentioned too much personal things here and I just want a break from it. I have an urge to try other things out and be more motivated than sticking to just here lol. Well for sure, I won't totally abandon this place but just that.... I won't be appearing here that often, maybe. =/

Let's just see what happens for the past weeks. I was irritated with work, again and again. Problems can only come up one after another. And then, this week I was worrying over a customer's request and felt a little guilty that I'm afraid I made the mistake trying to accede to his request. >_< I swear I will not repeat it again and be more careful alright. Other than that?  Co-workers complaining over all sorts of things again and again.

Who can ever feel that there's any morale anymore? -_-

Anyway, unhappy things aside. Just look at what's been making me happy. haha.

^Lovely gifts received from my dearie who went to Japan for holiday! (☆∀☆)

^Got the free Kumamon bag from mosburger for eating their limited edition burger. Oh, but I wasn't the one eating it. lol.

^Time to use the perfume and body lotion/wash after keeping them for so long! I bought the other brand of water gel and it just works as well in keeping my skin moisturised. Just that, it didn't have the feeling as good as Hada lobo though. Now I wonder which one still I stick to using.

Now I have a crazy amount of masks to use! Those are of which I received as gifts again and so I didn't need to buy for long time. hahaa. I really need to use as much as I can since I don't have much space to store them altogether.

Was shopping at Daiso yesterday and there isn't much that I can buy though. But at least I'm glad they have come up with new stocks of Wa styled hair accessories so I bought one scrunchy! I love the hairband I got too! The hairbands that I've bought throughout my life just keeps spoiling for whatsoever reasons! (=ﾟДﾟ=) I hope this one last a bit longer. lol. And there, I feel having the urge to buy more hair accessories and treat my hair much better. I need to make myself look prettier right? There are some I just can't bear to throw away yet. Well I guess I need time to go through them again and once I got better ones I shall just clear time.

Time to treat myself right!!

Cosmos #10 | on the road to recovery

It's been a sick week. (,_,)

Well last Saturday I managed to do a little update despite that I wasn't feeling well. My throat got more painful as the days go by, the most painful time being at night on Sunday. It was sooooo painful that I couldn't sleep! Eveytime I drink or swallow food or anything, it hurts like mad!! It was definitely the first time for me to bear with such a pain in my throat! I think I experienced such a virus attack on me like every year if I'm not wrong. But this time it was the most horrible since I have to be on sick leave for 2 days cos of this pain. Although after that I'm still not recovered but at least better to be outside. I remember 3 years ago I had a terrible sore throat too and also cough which lasted a month? That's because I didn't consult the doctor and self-cure at home since I wasn't working anyway. lol. That is bad in itself. But this time it is more damaging than I thought. It actually hurt more than what hurt back then. It even changed my tastebuds which affected my appetite yesterday at lunch. I totally can't bring myself to finish the food. For this entire week, I've wasted a lot of food because of it. But I don't wish to!! I really can't bring myself to eat them anymore or else I might puke at any time. I'm really really deeply sadden for what has happened to my body. It could be the medicines that brought me this. I completed the ones for inflammation and pain but antibiotics is something that I cannot stick to though. I've stopped after 3 days of dosage. I have been feeling the discomfort in my stomach at night as well. How can I continue anymore when I felt so horrible for so long? The medicines didn't seem to be working. And also, most throat pains are caused by virus and therefore antibiotics won't work against them isn't it? I mean, I really had enough of this torture for the whole week. ヽ(≧Д≦)ノ

Now that it has transformed into phlegm and making my voice a little weird. (-_-) Okay, but at least the pain has gone. God bless! At least I can talk like normal again. It's actually such a blessing to talk normally and eat food with flavour. Trust me, this little things in life that we never consider to be significant is actually a blessing in itself. I am thankful that I felt better after a whole week of torture. (´；Д；｀)

Yeah then it leaves me thinking that this year certainly begins as a huge ass for me. Why is it such a rockery road during such a short period of time in 3 months? I'm also beginning to be dissatisfied with my current job now cos my manager keeps throwing things at me to do when she can settle them herself. And keep using the length of my employment as the dumb reason that I should be able to do the work. What an asshole when she worked even longer than me. My coworker is also dissatisfied with her and complains whenever she's not around. It's nasty to have someone who makes things that aren't your business to be your business. Dumb ass why should we care about every single thing when it is not of our concern or responsibility? And not to mention, she has been very fake (all along) at not just praising people but also (began) offer her help but in the end the work is thrown to me. Bravo. That's how she resort to handle things right now. (¬_¬)

Is this a little late for me to mention my dissatisfaction? I've already tried to be wary of her and I know not to be too nice to trust her since when I just got in, she actually put the blame on me when talking to the customer when I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON. I was totally clueless since I just took over the job and not familiar with everything. But she was indeed quick enough to blame me since I was new. Instead when she could have checked first. It has already left a mark in me since the incident. And she did threaten to say to me (when it's just the both of us) that she will not let me stay if I didn't perform well since I took a longer time to complete the tasks. But hey, I was willing to spend more time and OT just for the sake of completing. Why didn't anyone see my efforts? ⋋_⋌

Maybe it's time. The time will come anyway. I know not everyone is perfect but there's a limit to anyone's tolerance. It's better to keep away from toxic people before they destroy you. And especially when you know where you stand, when there isn't any chances of you going ahead in the same place.

 
How I hope I can make things messed up and let her suffer one day. HAHAHA. Well, that said....I hate to continue talking about her actually. LOL.

Now let's zoom into what I've got before I was sick. I even went for a long walk on a sunny day with my precious friend. And hanging out at the museum for so long and did a little shopping. I bought myself rubber stamps of Jinbeisan cos it's so cute!!! Although this was expensive and not necessary at all but I can't stop myself at the sight of this!! Rubber stamps have always been my favourite and I thought I have to be nice to myself sometimes. I didn't regret this at all!! And what's with me into blue right? I even got a blue highlighter along with it. hahaa.

And during that week I thought of experimenting my eyebrows by drawing them on and see if it's better. Oh yes indeed it is! Look at the difference on my left one! No wonder girls are into drawing their brows before they go out. I can't believe that's how the difference is especially when taking photos. Your face really comes off better with nicely shaped brows too. I tried to be more diligent by drawing them on for the week. But then when sickness strikes, I stopped drawing since last week for a week now. (x_x)

Wow, so that's how fast things could change huh.. It's definitely the time for me to think about things more and plan ahead. Most importantly is to get my health back into place. And be more productive. I hope I can do more for myself and not to be too bothered about everything. Bless me I hope things get better as much as my health.


After a storm, I will see the rainbow before me isn't it?

I.will.save.myself.

Shopping Saturday~ ٩(๑´3｀๑)۶

Had done my happy shopping on Saturday! It was rainy but it doesn't matter since the weather is so unpredictable lately. I'm glad there are so many sales going on!! I bought quite a lot of other stuffs too but I'm only showing a few things here lol. I even got myself 2 pajamas! Since after watching Melodee's night time routine she mentioned the benefits of wearing pajamas to bed to sleep better. Yeah for me to have another thing to spend my money on. (≧▽≦)

Well but now, I'm gonna do review for the products that I've bought some time ago so this goes:

• Fair Fluer loose powder (pink beige) : I am so happy that loose powders are still around and I can find a good one! I don't get why those big brands aren't selling loose powders anymore and even if I can find one from a cheaper brand it's not of that much quality imo. Japanese ones are just so good! Although could be too pinkish for me but I dab only a little on my face so I think it doesn't matter. It has the most sweet smelling rose scent which made me think as though I'm putting bandung on my face. haha. I think I'm pretty satisfied from using this. ❀

• EH pore tightening essence : Honestly, I just can't figure out if those pore essence work or not. I've been sticking to ZA one and I feel it's pretty okay. And both these 2 products are just skincare products that will go into my skin and making me feel better that my pores should be tighten after using them. So is this just for me to console myself? lol. But I have a huge problem with pores so this kind of product is probably something that I will have to stick to for a long long time.

• Hada labo water gel : I'm starting to be impressed with water gel now, cos they seem to be absorbed into my skin fast and leaving my skin really hydrated and comfortable the entire day. I used to stick to ZA moisturizer for many years already but recently last year I began to think I should change my moisturizer cos I don't feel that product is being effective on me anymore. My skin still feels dry after using which is weird!! Well I think it's also probably got to do with age so I need a better product for my skin this time. And indeed! I didn't regret buying this water gel cos it works so well. Just that I don't like to dip in to get the product. I'll rather pour cos it'll be more hygienic. But it has got to do with the product viscosity so that's why they'll package it that way? But how about press pumps? That would be a better way though.

Yeah I'm done with this and I still wanna do more shopping!!!  (・∪・)

Life has to be worth living by being happy each day.✨

What a coincidence! During this week, I was feeling down from work. Too many things happened lately especially with people who keep coming and going. It's just tiring to deal with different people from time to time and also customers with stupid demands that makes no sense. This all made me find work to be meaningless now. What I'm doing now is just for the sake of getting the pay and nothing else. Since I know there won't be a chance for me to learn more and progress but instead be thrown to cover shitty things in the future who knows. I don't really have a good feeling about it anymore. I'm really getting so tired from all the crap to face cos I always have to do double work. And things that can be solved by others they rather throw to me and then back to them. What's the problem with them huh? Or can I say the work process is just dumbass? What if I messed up the work cos I'm unsure? Yeah that might ended up that my co-workers will be angry with me cos they'll have to do the correction which means they'll have to deal with double work. But why am I the one to bear with it just because I'm the most junior. Fuuu~~!! But then, I'm angry with them in the first place because no one is passing instructions properly. It made me almost making a mistake which might be huge. I really wanna give them a tight slap on the face cos they like to push work about and always throw this sentence "You should ask." YOU ARE THE ONE WHO SHOULD TELL!! Who the fuck knows what you're thinking and what's right. How would I know what are the right questions to ask? Will you always answer me with patience? [Mostly, is no] Is it so difficult to give proper instruction than assume? How can you compare me with you who've worked for mushroom years? You know better but you rather sit and wait for others [me] to know what you want and do it for you. Damn, just damn!!! I'm getting so pissed with the people here. ⋋_⋌

Back to talking about meaningless. Came across that while watching a tv show at night, where the 2 characters are talking about whether life is meaningless to deal with someone who angers you and shorten your life. They're talking about a family member though, and whether she should just divorce the man, but she didn't care about what's meaningful or meaningless or not and just lead her life like this. That sounds like a loser isn't it? Why should you torture yourself and making him living off you, unless you still have the love for him. But no, they didn't even talk anything about love. I wonder is it about the responsibility she can't give up or she's just lazy to think how to improve her life. Either that we all have a choice to make, but there are people like her who are sticking with the bad ones. I just don't get it. Why do you wanna care what others think when you don't owe them a living? There's nothing wrong even if you divorce at any age, be it in your 50s. What's so ashamed about it? It's more shameful if you let people to pull you and direct your life instead of yourself even at that age. You should live a life that makes you happy, not troubled. I just don't understand her thoughts...  (¬_¬)

Okay, it's only a drama character but somehow I got affected by it lol. Well I was thinking of it in terms of my job. I'm not totally unhappy though, since I've been too used to comparing it with my previous job which was much worse. I do cherish this current one that I'm having that's why I'm always doing my best each day. But on one hand, I think those people are taking me for granted. Bet that in their minds they think I won't leave. But I will, cos I know for sure this is not the place for me to get by forever. I don't wanna get stuck. I just need to find the right time to go and be prepared for it. I'm afraid that I'll end up really getting unhappier each day until it was too obvious that everyone knows I'm gonna leave? I wanna give a shocking surprise instead. HAHAHA. Yeah I'm just dreaming but hey that day might come.....

So to the part about coincidence! I wanted to read books that would prepare me for it! And it so happens that I found those good books related to jobs that were on sale yesterday. It was such a great deal!! I'm happy for this! (⌒‐⌒) I'm so gonna finish up those books and talk about it. LIFE HAS TO BE WORTH LIVING BY BEING HAPPY EACH DAY. ~[This quote is by me. ヽ(・∀・)ノ]

Yeah I guess I do vent enough by saying so much earlier on. My reading last month was this Chinese book on independence. How a woman should be independent herself.

Well, because the mountains will fall and the people will leave, so depending on yourself is the best thing ever!

But this book doesn't give a lot of useful pointers on how to be independent. The content are mostly stories heard by the author and so she's giving us real-life examples of what some women faced. And so the conclusion is that we shouldn't depend on others but ourselves cos life will be better this way!!

Oh well, anyway I did a little quiz few days ago for the fun of it and realised it's true that I still depend on a lot of people in my life and it seems that I can't get away with it. Is reliance a bad thing? I don't know how can I get away for now when it's pretty good so far. There's just so much to do for being independent. The burden on the shoulders seem to sink a lot. lol. I guess the only way that will force me to not rely on others is when there's someone who will need to depend on me. That if I wasn't around things won't work and the world will end. (;・・) Well, that is, if indeed there is someone who needs me a lot. If not, my life will probably still be.....


Even alone, life can still be good.

But who knows what the future will bring?

Cosmos #08 | Have every reason to be happy!

Yeah I'm probably getting back on track!! For this week especially, my co-workers were commenting that I looked really happy and they thought there might be nice things that happened to me that made me felt that way. And I was told to share good news with them if I have any. LOL. Well, there's nothing more happening these days, I just feel contented with the way things are now. I'm happy with my life. I'm glad that I can enjoy whatever I want at this moment at my own pace. Things have been peaceful and good. And listening to my favourite Kpop group now actually made me happy because of them. Every bit of them. ♥ That's just every reason that I should be happy with. ^_^

I got myself pumped up by doing my colouring which I wanted to complete a page in a long time! I took 2 days over the last weekend to get it done. Strangely, I just have the mood to slowly colour at every detail, but you know such things really require the mood. (・・;) Probably because I have the strong urge to at least complete a page for myself so that I can be proud of it. haha.

Wow really, I felt it was an achievement after I got it done! Since I couldn't draw well, colouring might be the second to it that I can do the most. I felt it was a little pity cos I love to draw when I was little. But I know I didn't have the talent as I grew older. Sometimes I do have the itch to draw my favourite idols in cute anime form but I really lack of the creativity and the skill. I don't know where to start with. I used to try to draw an anime character Cardcaptor Sakura during my tertiary school days. I had the whole picture as a reference. I tried my very best to draw but it looked weird to me and I can't say why. Until I showed to a friend and she told me immediately that I got the proportions wrong. The whole thing was an ugly disaster! I actually ruined it! (;´д｀)

From then on, I think it's best that I'll not draw anymore cos I just don't know how and it might make me even more upset if I didn't get it right. I have thoughts of getting how-to-draw books but I can't make myself go through every steps and be patient with it. [The thought of having to spend hours at drawing turns me off. lol.] Well it's not as if I have to be good at it, so it didn't mattered to me that I didn't carry on anymore. I just don't feel like wasting my time on something that I know for sure that I won't excel in it no matter what. Artists themselves are people who really know how to draw without being taught! All they need is just a pen and paper and they can draw perfect lines and shapes. BUT I CAN'T. I need all sorts of tools like ruler, flexible ruler and pencil so that I can keep erasing any off points but artists don't need to! Maybe practice does help but I don't have what it takes. lol. Patience and mood for art is what I'm lacking. But one thing for sure, I do know how to appreciate art for all the effort. ╰(*´︶`*)╯

Whatever with this childhood dream of mine being an artist, I don't care about it anymore. Colouring attracts me better since I don't have to think so much and be mindful with proportions. All I have to do is filling in with colours! Such an easy tasks which relives my stress as well. Haha. Anyway I noticed adult colouring fad may seem to die down a little down and calligraphy seems to be the new thing. Those brush pens does capture my eyes too! Especially with so many colours!! Well I didn't say I'm into it now since I'm a lagger. But I think I'm more interested in Chinese words than English words for now. All the strokes are gonna confuse my mind. So yeah, not at this moment as I need to let my mind off not thinking about anything difficult. lol. But how, should I even attempt at trying something new?  ^_^;

Okay, as a way to push myself a little further, I decided to name this 'project' as Zekkai [絶界: reference from B-T song] So every time when I accomplish something, I will up myself one level. Then this will make me wanna go ahead to do more and be better! How many levels will there be then? Well, no idea! Maybe it's infinite so that there's always room for me to get better. hahaa. What a way to get myself moving. Since I managed to post a lyric - ONE and done my colouring - TWO, so I'm at Zekkai Stage 2!! YEAH~~ I'm still at such a low stage. (>ω<) Let me complete something else so that I can go stage 3. HAHAHA. (≧▽≦)


Now for a little precious thing I wanna mention. I got this Sensu which is so Kagrra-ish!!! I was so happy yesterday that a little shopping made me so delighted at getting something which is so useful for me now.

LOOK AT IT ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL?

I can proudly wave this fan about while I'm outside and secretly feeling happy in a sense that I'm showing the world I'm a Kagrra, fan. Well, nobody knows my motive but I don't care!! It's Chikai no Tsuki or Omou or whatever you can think of because of that moon. It's isshi's love to me. ヾ(*´∀｀*)ﾉ ♥♡♥♡

I have the self-love, the thing which I should never forget.

Better hair this time ^_^

Yeah time for an update on my hair! Last Saturday was the forth time that I went to the salon for scalp treatment. Oops but I wasn't that diligent in using the scalp spray everyday though as times goes by. (>ω<) But at least this time my hairstylist commented lesser oily scalp than before [compared to the first time when she saw my condition] although the dead skin was found to be rather thick? O_O Anyway the hairstylist that I usually go to for the past 3 times wasn't around anymore so I'm back to my original hairstylist so hmm I hope it was good? She gave me a harder massage than a relaxing one and I was afraid that she didn't really know my scalp progress but can only compare it to the first time she saw me. But whatever, I guess. At least she still provides me with the good service except that I wished she could have been more focused on me. But it was a weekend so they were all busy and it didn't turn out super satisfactory for me. It all actually took 2hours 15 mins which is the longest time ever that I'm at in this salon. lol. I mind about it just a little, so next time I probably should always be going on weekdays instead. Yeah for such pampering session. lol.

The other thing I bought on my third session was the scalp shampoo. I can't believe that this was actually good! Damn are we consumers just can't be able to buy the right shampoo for ourselves at the store or are the shampoos sold out there are actually that bad for us? I've no idea what's the issue. The thing is, this is the best shampoo so far that I've used! It even leaves my hair feeling so soft I don't know what is this magic!!  I didn't think much about it at first it cost $38 which is more expensive than usual shampoos but after I used my current organic shampoo, everytime I just feel it left my hair kinda dry and the scalp still feels kinda oily or something. Then I must have a bad hair day the next day no matter how I comb it. (¬_¬) It's such a hassle to maintain nice hair!! Well this new shampoo helps a bit, but I'm still bad at blow drying it so it won't be that straight as what my hairstylist is able to do. I'm guilty of it. But I don't have awesome hands so I won't care about it that much still. (x_x) Since I have to return to the salon every month so my hair will still be taken care of and looks good for....a day or two at least?  (≧▽≦) Better than nothing. And I've been taking selfies of my hair everytime after it. This is at least something nice right? hahaha.

Well, it's been months since I started on the scalp treatment so I'm glad for the improvement. I do noticed lesser hair fall than before, although there was once I combed out a few strands lumped together while in the office. (・_・)  I was shocked when I saw it that time, and there was the other time it happened at home too. I guess my hair fall is still quite a problem especially during shampooing my hairstylist still see my hair coming off quite a bit. I'm so scared!!!  ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ Okay, but this reminds me that I have to probably do some head massage for myself regularly at home in addition to this. Can't possibly depend everything on the hairstylist for me right. I must make myself take better care of my hair too!! Ahhhhh!!!!

Yeah, and next time when I update on my hair again, hopefully is much better than now. Bless me!

Cosmos #07 | What's with my mood?

It was probably quite an empty week for me. I don't think I've done much, or anything productive that I feel proud of this time. I tried doing some colouring on Tues cos after I watched some colour pens drawing video appearing on my feed my heart twitched a little. I thought I got the mood to do something really nice this time and yeah I should colour the page and enhance my mood, but it didn't last long. I coloured only 3 pieces of small leaves and 2 small flowers AND I'M DONE. I can't continue anymore. All I want to do after work is to forget about everything else and just watch the TV. TV has always been my kind of therapy at home to make me not able to think of anything else except staring at the screen and see what happens. I don't need to do a thing unlike the computer. So I've just stayed this way for the whole week. What am I to do? I don't have the mood or enthusiasm to do the things I like. My mood is dampened for unknown reasons. Maybe because of Mr Stomach torturing me from time to time and not knowing what's wrong with it. I even lost my appetite on Saturday. It's quite a pain that I can't bring myself to eat but my stomach just keep grumbling empty. It's enough to make me a stone not wanting to do a thing. I hate how it turns out. And I've got no idea how to bring my mood back when I don't even have the mood to look at how to bring my mood back. UGH. (｡-_-｡)

Okay, it's not totally bad though. Have made myself post a damn long ass lyric to feel better and bought something while I'm out. So what have I done?  =/

^ Chocos are supposed to make me happy right? I got orange dark choco which is the combination of my both favourites! This brand is damn good it's soft as a choco and the orange taste is on point. I've yet to try the new Kit Kat but yeah my mood was better only for a while after I ate the orange one. >_<

^ I'm glad for a sale going on at the beauty store! 2 boxes of facial masks and a pair of hand mask and a loose powder!!! I'm curious of how the hand mask will make my hands turn out to be. Let me post about it when I get myself to use it! hehehe.

Well but this..... was just something I got because I wanna spend my money. What an ass I am hahaha. They are probably only for decoration purpose and not that it'll really help to make wishes come true but whatever. I'm consoling myself in this way that at least I grab something that would make me feel better to have something good with me. LOL. What else? V-day is coming and I should feel loved in some way. In my own way. (´へεへ`*)

Since another week has to come, let me have another fresh start again. I will do my best. And not to forget all the things that I've wanted to do badly. ❦

Cosmos #06 | Hello February!

Ahh.. so I haven't been able to blog for the past week! I had the CNY holidays but I was too tired to do anything else productive like blogging. The only thing I wanted most is to have proper rest and regain my energy to face all the load of paper mountains at work. That said, I was extremely exhausted from the time to prepare to move and after settling down to the new office. I'm pretty sure somehow I'm still not used to the whole new environment. The first week [which was just last week before CNY] I have to keep reminding myself that I have to alight at the right station although it's just a stop before the previous workplace. lol. It was just not in my subconsciousness yet and since I didn't have the mood all along, I didn't even listen to my favourite music while on the way. I can describe my whole month in January as just being exhausted. Nothing else. There is nothing more for the whole month that I can plan or do anything for myself. The CNY holidays are too short since we have to go visiting and preparing to have the same meals for days. Yeah that's how every year this holiday will be for us. ^_^;

I'm glad I can have an additional day off but it was kinda ruined by a friend of mine. Yeah, just why do I have friends who take me for granted? I'm beginning to pile up suspicions of her since she's gotten weird during that day I would believe that she's being possessed. I mean she doesn't have a soul all along anyway. hahaa. I just don't like how she keeps pulling a long face and putting the blame on me no matter what I tried to do and respect her decisions, yet she doesn't care about mine. (-_-)  Keep rebutting at me no matter what I suggested. Had enough of selfish people, shouldn't I? Especially when you can just tell me your thoughts instead of expecting me to know what you're up to all the time. I prefer people to be honest than beat about the bush. Why can't friends be this way? She's getting over my limit too. I've been tolerating her for years, for so long. Until that I'm the one who's gonna go crazy and being unhappy instead. Why should I be affected by someone who doesn't care about me right? Anyway, I can't pinpoint what exactly is wrong with her but her behaviour is like that all along, just that it gets worse this time which is over my tolerance. I guess my patience with people is harming me in some way that leaves me breathless instead. I should really be kinder to myself and get rid of people who gives no damn about me won't you agree too?

Argh whatever, I have to speak bad of someone in order to feel better afterwards. xD

So now, I supposed I need some time to get back in fulfilling my resolutions yeah? haha. I'm kinda losing my pace after a whole month of torture so I'm glad it's over. Let the bad be over since more and more people are leaving and so should some of those 'friends' in my life. I certainly need to get rid of poison people who did me no good. Life should be better this way. I should have less troubles after this. I'm entitled to be happy, certainly.

Well, let me talk about something happy for myself. Since I wanted to do shopping badly, I have to show some of the things I bought!

^ As I have been using masks less lately, I make myself buy this box at least so to push myself to use them more! What a waste if I just keep them instead of pampering myself a little at home. See, that's what I ended up doing nothing but sleep when I was so exhausted and bothered about work. lol.  Anyway, I hardly use liquid eyeliners and so I ended up using it only once a year for CNY! I've kept my current one for 2 years and I figured I better get a new one and try it on someday. I do like how eyeliners can make my eyes look big and beautiful but it just takes up too much time for me. I need a lot of patience and mood to put it on. Or to say, I need a lot of practice so maybe I should do it often so that it'll end up easier for me to draw them next time. But really, I don't need big eyes all the time. I still wanna look exceptional beautiful on special days. hahaha.

I was kinda attracted to getting a new lipstick after I've watched a few beauty youtube videos. I love my current one so I wanna get another essence lipstick again. This time round I got the lightest shade since for some reason I just wanna go for a light peachy colour.

^ But you know what, it isn't peachy at all! It ended up too white on my lips if I were to use it on it's own. Then I tried using it as the top colour to highlight my current lipstick and in fact it works this way! Wow. Then it was this that I realised no wonder why they like to mix colours together often. Now this begin to be my thing too. (^o^)  It can actually be fun too when it turns out to be the result/effect that you want .Wow, just wow. (≧▽≦) I'm just slow to the makeup game. haha.

^ More cute things for myself~

^ And then Daiso food series of mochi I crazily get them all in different flavours. And there's the dark chocolate on the left. I'm surprised that they have such snacks now. Yet to try all of them!!

I'm considering this as my good day since I managed to buy 2 dresses and a denim jacket for work. This is a good start for my February as I've been waiting for that stall to bring in suitable clothes of my sizes. It's been a long while! Yeah since my January was empty.


Hello February. Here I come~! （*´・з・`*)ﾁｭｯ♪

xx
Yuuka

Cosmos #05 | Tough start

Gosh.. I haven't post the first Cosmos for the first week of this year for so long but now!!（・□・；）
As anyone would know, I was crazily busy for these 2 weeks. Yeah and for the first week of January, I was unwell and had to take sick leave from work. And then last week I suffered paper cuts from all the clearing and moving [but luckily I didn't rush everything back then] which hurts a lot! Now this week my stomach spins again and it hurts so much but since there's so much to do, I don't wanna take day off from work. So it has been a tough time so far. I was in no mood mostly so I haven't been watching BTS variety shows anymore. Or maybe I should since they always make my day. But somehow I wasn't getting into it in finding the videos or the time to get down watching it. (｡•́︿•̀｡) I just want more rest and regain my energy but I guess this will only happen when CNY comes. So this means I have to bear with this for another week more. What a tough month to go through. (╥╯θ╰╥) What a start but what can I not endure? At least this has been the best place that I've worked in although there are more changes taking place and making me really really confused and hesitated and maybe not so motivated like before.....But I just feel I can't complain too much. All the busyness hasn't allow me to cherish the times here better. I don't wanna appear slack or not being serious in front of anyone. But so far I just wanna focus solely on my job that's all. Although it feels as though I'm not progressing and there's no room for me to do so, hmm what else can I do then? I can only think through all this well enough probably when I have a long holiday away from work. (._.)

Argh. Whatever I am saying. I don't wanna think so much for now. I know it's not as though I will work here forever but I just feel not prepared for anything other thing else yet. (,_,) 


One great thing last week is that my friend has helped me with my Japanese lyrics for 雨月 so this made me so touched and happy! Finally there's something nice that I can talk about for this entry. lol. I was thinking probably I might not have time for my Cosmos post but somehow I think I should be able to squeeze out a little time today since tomorrow I should be out to do some necessary shopping. Although my right foot aches and hurts quite a bit today, but maybe it'll get better tomorrow. I have to things to do instead of staying home. [although I don't mind not doing a thing all day but better not! lol]

What other nice things should I report about? Today I spotted a nice owl wrapping paper which I was so thrilled about and I'm glad I have sharp eyes for this. hahaha.

 And then some nice replies that happened last week from Jen and Aileen:

Well then probably nothing else nice to mention. ^_^;  I'm still trying my best to spring clean this blog too and so far I've managed to clear a lot of the Favourite sites list. Somehow it's almost impossible to clear things really well and clean I wonder why some remains just have to be there. lol. By this I'm referring to other things else too. I wonder where and what will ever be clean enough. Argh. Am I not referring to the bumps on my earlobes? Disgusting enough. Maybe I need to disinfect every thing I come across. Ahhhh!!!! 

xx
Yuuka

[OD] Sadly and weirdly~

Another outdated post! I'm pretty into spring cleaning everything else besides the physical items in my room. I'm set to do that for the images in my phone, my youtube channel and my emails. hahaha. How weird I only get the mood to do so for this year. Probably because after I'm done with my own items I also have to do for work since it's definitely the best that I clear and reduce as many things so that I need not bring too much over to the new place. Wow what a revamp! lol.

I feel this time round my life can turn for a new start. I'm not sure how things will go though. But it's always nice to have a good change. Yet I have a struggle recently since I organised my things way too good until.... I forget where I've placed them. (;´д｀) Darn for my forgetful brain!! I don't know if I should laugh or cry. And my memories could be messed up. lol. It took me some time to find and recall where I've placed my Japanese CD-rom that I need it to get myself to study with the book. Climbing up and down and searching for the right box that contains the thing I want to find. Yet I secretly laughed inside when the same happened to my co-workers just few days back. LOL.


Well, let's just get back to me going through all these old pictures sinking in my phone. hahaa.

^ This was last year when my friend found out this yukata instruction sheet lying on the table only after we figured out how to wear and tie the obi. (¬_¬) Why didn't this thing appear earlier? We struggled for so long. Argh, probably is just me since mine was the traditional one where I really need to get the obi done. I know I should have be familiar with it in the first place but somehow when I happened to see those on youtube tutorials they made me even frustrated after seeing how complicated and difficult it is to do that I just gave up. Then I was too tired to see anymore and do a demo first myself at home. (x_x) I'm lucky my friend was nice to observe others and figured it pretty quickly and so I shall say that she was way better than those tutorials since it's done much faster than me watching the vids. Another thing that I don't know if I should laugh or cry. Ahhhh!!!!

I'm just posting the pictures here for reference in case I need to wear it again in the future cos my brain is really limited and can't remember too much. lol. Hopefully this will evoke my memories of how obi is tied. ^_^;

^ A piece of paper I've printed out from one comic book and that's because few years ago I was kinda into ancient chinese history so this was of a good reference to me. How did that happen? haha of course from watching chinese dramas! I have an interest in those type of stories although some aren't real history related but the way they dressed and live depicts the different timeline that happen in the show. I find it interesting that I can learn a bit about the times and also those phrases that I've not heard of. It's one of the ways where I can improve my chinese since I don't need to write or read frequently. But honestly, it's a sad thing how our mother tongue became stagnant at this age since we don't really need to use much at work. Same for dialect. So it totally depends on the individual whether you wanna watch and read more on your own. Since English is pretty much used everywhere who would really care about their mother tongue right? And it's not like it's being promoted or encouraged much. Sadly this has to happen. Maybe it's just here I guess. Well what can we do anyway? We can only be self-motivated if we want to keep the language going...Otherwise it'll just get worse.

^ What a nice scenery where the flyer can be viewed from here! But honestly I can't remember when and where is this. *yeah memories lost*

^ I remember showing this picture of the few escape games to my friends that we can go and have fun. But sadly it was not realised. We have too little people around us to call and be interested in such games. (,_,) What a pity sobs.

^ A bracelet I bought for myself some time last year if I'm not wrong and I like it a lot. ^_^

^ Can't remember if I have post this anywhere. My friend in school gave me when we just know each other after a month! It was a pleasant surprise gift. No one has ever give me a present that fast when we just knew each other. lol. That happened slightly more than 10 years ago.  (・o・) It's something that I treasure a lot since you see I didn't even remove the wrapper. But sadly again, I don't know where is this anymore. It's weird that after I spring clean some stuffs go missing. I could have accidentally misplace it I don't know. It just sucks to have a brain like mine. lol.

^ Bought these 2 snacks in early December if I'm not wrong. The rice crackers expired pretty fast! That's why it was on sale anyway. haha. The red bean chocolate biscuit is the jem!! It's really really tasty!! I finished the whole packet at one go. Can't describe how great it was I'm soooo amazed at the quality of it as a chocolate. Might buy it again but somehow hope it can be cheaper. ( ´•︵•` )

^ This is canned sweet corn from Daiso! I thought it would taste good but it's just ordinary.

^ This was the macdonalds treat that I won from a friend! It was pretty nice since I don't win things often lol. Oh yeah so this reminds me the last time I won was 2 years ago in September. Aww...that seems long ago enough. (・_・) I totally enjoy this feeling of being lucky. hahaha.

Alright, I will dig more and post any of such old photos next time. Can't wait to see when my phone is complete without a mess. lol.

[OD] Say it and it will come true?

Here I am doing a backlog of my old pictures that's still hanging in my computer. lol. This post simply is here to make me recall those memories.... So let me talk a bit about it.

^ Omg for a moment when I just read what the Coach has replied me I couldn't recall what song I'm telling him! So what else can I do besides searching for that tweet since I liked it? Damn it was of no use since Coach quote my tweet instead of replying mine. So I don't know which Kagrra song am I talking about. (>ω<) This is kinda vexing since I won't know what's going on back then but never mind. I need to post this since Coach replied me. Oops come to think of it, I have not tweeted Coach ever since. I need to remind him of Kagrra, once again when I can. And therefore this will make me have the urge to brush up on my Japanese in order to chat with him once more. hahaha.

^ Damn this took place on 02 Dec 2015. Even further from the Coach tweet! lol. I was too happy over how Swoozie likes my tweet although it's not the first time but I like his little action of liking my tweet again and again. hahaha. He never fail to make my day as well. I really appreciate how he bothers to read my tweet and comments to him since I didn't think he would care about a small fry like me but yeah, he does! So he's one youtuber I like a lot along with his jokes. Definitely one cool guy worth my support. (^ε^)

^ Ahh, lastly about this movie I've watched last year which is called Erased 僕だけがいない街. I watched the anime when it was just released in early 2016. Sadly it got removed after I only watched a few episodes from it. (x_x) Nevertheless the story was pretty good. I kinda expected the ending since the main character Satoru wanted to change the past in order to save friends and his mum, so he has to die and be 'erased' from the earth in order to do so. A sad ending but his action is really admirable and noble. I only felt pity for him that he did not get to be with the girl Airi whom he likes. Well, I believe he liked her. It looks obvious. But I'm also kinda upset that he didn't confess his feelings to her. At least something good has to happen in the show isn't it? It's just a pity that this didn't happen. (;´д｀)

At the start of the movie I got kinda bored at first since it's exactly the same as the anime to outline the plot. Anyway I'm kinda impressed how the print on the ticket still remains clear till now cos the other ticket of mine in which I watched later than Erased has already faded. Yeah I'm impressed with how the Erased ticket hasn't got erased yet LOL.

The thing that I recalled from this movie is that they mentioned about saying things out so that it will come true. If I didn't remember wrongly, they're referring to their wishes. If you said it, it will come true. This is something that has been bothering me for some time though. I don't know if saying it will make it come true or not since during birthdays when you're making a wish you don't usually say it. If it really comes true, does this mean God is answering your wishes? Or is this just coincidence? Or that you have clairvoyance and predicted the future at the right time? Or it is the level of your consciousness that resulted in the law of attraction? So what can it be?? WHICH IS THE RIGHT ANSWER? ＼（＞０＜）／ SHOULD I SAY OUT MY WISHES OR NOT?

I have not decided what I wanted to do for this so......

I might just keep it in my heart for now.

If one day it happens that when I said my wish and it did came true, that's when I'll begin to say all my wishes out ONE BY ONE.

If only it happens.