Can I start all over again?

What shall I do when I felt discouraged by someone? When she seems to be pulling me down instead of helping. I'm disappointed by what I have to face now. Things aren't supposed to be this way. (,_,)

Even as I want to cry, it's not gonna make me feel any better.

I wanted to sleep to forget, but it's only temporary.

I wanna forget the harsh words and even pretend that it didn't hurt me, but it did.

I've always tried to bury my feelings deep so that no one can see or try to even think that I'm weak.

YET...

I wished I could punch the person's face so much!

My sadness developed into anger..And then sadness again.

Why am I being nice, why didn't I say the things that I wanted to say?


If only I could totally do what I want without troubled by anything thing else. If I choose a different path in the first place, probably I would not need to face this problem.

The only thing I know now is that no one can help except myself. (T ^ T) Can't rely on anyone at all. [Strangely, this seem to only happens to me.]

While worrying is endless.. and

why happiness could only last for a while?

I feel that I need answers to all the things that I'm puzzled with. But not like I can get it from anywhere.


I feel kinda restlesss now. Tired with trying so hard for so long...

Why right in the first place, it was a mistake?

If that is really so, I wish I could start all over again too.. Just like what isshi would wished for.

If it really happens, I believe I would be able to meet him for real.   (^-^)


Well but one good thing I can say, is that it made me write some lyrics again.. I guess it's just me to write something whenever I feel sad.

And so, time to write more then.. Till I reached my goal.


One day, Isshi-sama will be proud of me for all that I've done.

I yearn for the day where I could let you see my achievements.  (T_T)


Kagrra, profle @ Red Moon Eclipse