Thinking way too much...?

Everytime when I see someone said to me "Everything happens for a reason." I'm not happy about this...at all. I can't help but to think "Oh yeah so what reason is it? But yet u couldn't tell me, nor help me either." (>__<)

It irks me because those are sad things that made me unable to comprehend why.. Especially those things that I don't wish to see it happen at all.

But of course, it's just life that we can't have happy things that happen all the time. Probably it's the unhappy ones that has to come so that we'll learn to cherish and become stronger.

But I still don't like it!!! And I can't stop thinking why! (x_x)

So now I  become someone with this crazy questioning mind, keep asking all sorts of questions all the time.

I read back my old diary and so was kinda surprised that I also used to state such a thing. "I believe all things happen for a reason."  Omg, I don't like it now.(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) Why did I write it that way?????

As u can see, because until now, there are some things that I still haven't yet got the reason as to why they happened.

Do I need to think so much? Why do I even need to bother about this? Time and again I've been wanting to tell myself to stop, and not care too much about every single thing in life. I've been so bothered by so many things and even some small matters cos I took them seriously they sort of worn me out. And now I kinda feel lack of energy. (ó﹏ò｡) I know I shouldn't, but somehow, the older I get, the more I think I have to look into many stuffs around me. I've already became a detail-oriented person and sensitive to many things, and so I can't ignore. And with the thought of 'Living life without regrets' I feel that I should definitely do more than I can as a person, no matter how small my efforts can be. So long as I don't let anyone down.


Well and because of that, I know, this feeling will never go away. It hasn't. I can stop thinking for a while, but it will still come back to me.


Sometimes is just that things progressed too fast I'm unable to catch up. And then I have to pause for a while to think how would I want to do again.


Surprisingly, when almost the same thing has to happen for the second time, I have to handle it somewhat the same and not to care too much. In fact, I'd probably be hurting myself instead.


Maybe the consistency of such a thought is due to me thinking for my lyric writing too. Maybe to a certain extent... Certainly I have lyrics where I managed to express some dark feelings but reading back them I feel the pain again.


Can I stop being an emotional person? (┯_┯)


Back to the top. ^ Maybe also, those who said that to me is make me feel better, since we're all sad. But it didn't. I feel worse for some reason. It's more like trying to come up with something to explain why certain unhappy things happened, but yet u aren't sure what is it either.



Human thoughts just puzzles me. I really wished it wasn't that complicated.


I'm still thinking way too much.  (｡-_-｡)



If only this world can be simpler enough, wouldn't that be better?