Anime Brothers conflict ブラザーズ コンフリクト

Brothers conflict ブラザーズ コンフリクト [12 episodes] → I was suddenly into reverse harem anime after watching Noragami [who knows why xD] and I get so happy watching so many guys. lol. I just find this whole story plot so funny cos it's definitely impossible for such a thing to happen. 13 step brothers all of a sudden. And that 12 of them are blood-related, except one is an orphan. But all of them looked so different. Is the mum so rich that she's capable of giving birth to so many and still looking young? And all the brothers love Ema, okay maybe except one, that cross dresser Hikaru who is the one who draw up the brothers conflict chart. How can all these happen? Lol.

That said, even this pet squirrel Juli also love Ema. （≧∇≦） But I like that he's being protective of Ema and giving advice to her.

The whole family~~

And how can any anime be without cats? Lol.


There, the comment that made me laughed so much at episode 4:

This comment make so much sense. xD Although it's kinda stupid, but it still made me wanna watch it cos I'm just curious what the brothers will do and how things will progress. Well the ending is kinda expected. I knew Ema wouldn't be choosing anyone in the end, cos she's kind and she won't want to hurt any of the brothers. Her choice is probably a good one, but then with the story ended this way that I expected of just doesn't satisfy me a lot. （≧∇≦） Somehow I hope she would pick one and then we can see how the other brothers will really fight and make a huge deal out of this. lol.

To me, I think Natsume is the best Onii-chan to have, since he is mature and caring. Louis being a mysterious person makes me wonder why he speaks so slowly and bit by bit. I thought he's supposed to be a foreigner in this anime cos of the hair too. lol. If I were to be Ema, I would probably choose Subaru. Maybe part of me just like sporty guys. haha. Although I think he may not be a caring person since he is not good with girls. lol. But at least, a good honest person who won't fool around? xD


Every episode that will start off with this line, in which is shown in the last episode.

But is obvious, their relationship won't be purely as brothers and sister. (*^◯^*)

And although it's kinda wrong of me to even think that Ema should make a choice, and that I'll choose Subaru if I were her. LOL! So wrong so wrong..


Still a good watch if you like to see many guys!! （*'∀'人）♥*+

I want to be inspired, and constantly be writing...

Wow six months is almost over.. and somehow I feel like I've really begin my journey just this year. lol.

I don't know what sums up as the best for me, but I'm pretty much happy to do what I can do thus far. ^_^

I really feel I'm on a steady pace now and so I just feel like writing this...

I have dreams that I couldn't accomplish yet.  There are things I want and yet they are far from reach. There are so many that I have to consider. And probably that's what that is pushing me forward.

I'm glad I can be able to get a good job and be loved by my friends. Everyone is telling me I'm so much of a cheerful person than before. Although at times I do hear the words "You've changed.", I supposed that they said with a good meaning and this was a good thing.  (≧▽≦)

Yet somehow, I'm afraid how would everyone thinks when they know the real me. It's quite a pain to hide, yet I don't want to show my true self so easily. I just hate being judged. Sometimes I'll rather this world to be less complicated and I need not know so much. ~( ´•︵•` )~

I know I've experienced much emotional changes over this period of time and especially since last year I think. But that's what the world has to be, putting you through and to make you grow. And so you have to find something that drives you forward and make you be able to cherish the good ones better and become stronger. Since I had that, I'm more than happy enough with how my life is now and being thankful that I can breathe well and also pursue my interest at my own time. Something that I would not have been able to imagine in the past. I'm really a fortunate person. And that I can sleep well at night, is the best thing ever too. (´ー`)☆

In order to get motivated and be doing something, I made myself watch shows/dramas/animes, and so it's not plainly for me to relax. In fact, sometimes the topic and content would be turning round and round in my head, and which I hope I can get them as inspiration for my writing. Or even do or buy the things I want. haha. What a torture. xD  All along when I was young, I watch shows so that my mind can get to rest, cos I won't be thinking of anything only when I'm looking at a screen. Well but now it's a different story. How is that I grow out of it suddenly? lol. But indeed, sometimes my mind just gets so occupied and I won't be able to get enough rest. Somehow I wish I can control this well. haha.

So far up till now, I've completed 16 shows [animes including OVA +dramas] and I considered this quite a bit of achievement since I made myself to listen to more Japanese I can be able to catch some words better than before, and there are always new things for me to learn from. It's quite a good way, especially you're focused on watching and repeat after what the characters are saying. I find this helpful. =)

I wonder why some people can write so often every single day. How is it that there's so many things that can come out from your brain all the time? I can't do so and I have to see my mood and inspiration for the day, before I can write well enough. I do hope I can progress from writing lyrics to writing fiction perhaps, although I'm not sure if I'm good enough and describing things well. I hope language wise mine will improve cos of that and also not to forget my Japanese! I might be learning at a slower pace now since I have other commitments, but I'll never stop. One day I shall make myself able to write my lyrics directly in Japanese. I'll never forget this dream of mine that I wanted to do so, being proficient enough for isshi's sake is definitely the reason, for him and for myself. (*´︶`*)

Now whenever I'm feeling down, I will tell myself 'no problem, isshi knows this. Hang on just a little more.' I know it every time I see his photo on my phone lock screen, and so it made me calm down much more. I'm glad how this can make me feel better, and I'm able to get myself back up again.

And since I've did my best all the while, there won't be any regrets.

Everyone is happy with me and love me I'm really blessed.

I shall not keep envying people and wonder why I can't be like them. I shall let them be my source of motivation instead. And be satisfied with who I am. Who knows there might be people envying me instead. lol.


Well life will go on good when you're strong. And then you'll get to see the light.


May the force be with you..

May isshi always be with me..♡

My purchases ~June 2015

Whee~~ There's sales going on almost everywhere how can I stop myself from looking around and buying stuff. lol.Well but then there's not quite a lot of stuff that I have bought for the past week. I'm just itching to get something when I'm out. Haha. At least, I do feel satisfied a little that I can bring something back home? xD I've been buying snacks quite often so that's getting dangerous! LOL! （≧∇≦）

I've bought 3M acne patch again since I think this brand is better afterall. I've used that Korean brand for some time and I think it doesn't work as well as the first one I've used which is 3M as recommended by Michelle Phan. I'll probably stick to 3M then. But in fact, I didn't expect myself to be relying on acne patches nowadays just cos I'm lazy to use an acne cream [which don't usually work for some brands I've used] and hoping acne patches are the fastest way to get rid of my acne. Oh well... It just has to work!! lol.

I can't live without using facial masks and just keep buying more. And now I'm even getting eye masks! I hope it does reduce my dark circles although many products and stuff can only help to reduce but not cure it. I'd probably have to stick to having panda eyes for the rest of my life but I'm still trying my best. lol. Just can't ignore the problems I'm facing. ( ´∵｀)

Anyway, it's the melon flavoured that attracts me to buy this. But I think the biscuit really aren't as good as Pocky. Really, from now on I shall just stick to eating Pocky I guess. This didn't made me feel it's worth to buy cos I didn't feel like finish eating all of them. (-｡-; Or maybe I shall stop buying snacks? lol.

Wa~~ I spotted this Hello Kitty pads how should I not get this!! Alright it's the packaging that attracted me and I'm curious how the pads gonna look like, whether it'll have nice kitty prints and maybe some nice fragrance. [although I've not opened it till now xD] No idea yet if the quality is good at all. lol. I remembered once I posted about sanitary pads that I've tried, and it didn't make me wanna buy it. I wonder if this Hello kitty one is gonna make me repurchase it... (・・;) But I still hope it's good to use. Haha.

I'm finishing up my current foundation in a matter of 2 months!! (ﾟOﾟ) Since I've been using it almost everyday except for Sunday. Probably the highest usage among all the cosmetic products I'm using! I'm gonna stick to using this HydraWhite foundation cos so far it's the best to me and hydrates my skin quite well as a foundation. I haven't found one that I'm really impressed with throughout all these years of using a few different brands, so well..since this one is pretty good. Although initially I used a different one in which I find it a bit oily. Maybe good foundations are just hard to find.  (,_,)

I've no idea what's the exact name for that pink one that holds up your fringe, I called it fringe patch anyway. It's really useful to put up the fringe away from the face when you're applying makeup. I already have a pair but I still wanna get more! I wanted to get fanciful cute ones but there isn't much to my liking that are available and they're mostly black. Argh. As you know, there should always be other colours other than black. Black is too boring as a colour!! Noooo way!! Lol. I don't wanna get anything that's black. xD


yeah for more shopping!! (*^◯^*) What's next?

Let me keep going...

Went to an anime expo last weekend although it's not anything exciting since I'm watching animes that are 'outdated' and those that are showcased there are the latest and popular ones that I have no idea of! lol. So there I have to go back home without buying any merchandises and maybe feeling a little empty cos of that. But oh well, not that disappointing since there's this cute uchiwa available in the goodie bag. And I got a free balloon too lol. (>ω<)

Since I've walked around and looking through all the pamphlets, let me just note the list of animes that were mentioned. Probably all this to be added to my Pending/to-watch list and be left there as well? xD

Animes:
01. Plastic memories
02. Etotama
03. Angel Beats!
04. Strike witches
05. To Love-Ru
06. Sword Art Online
07. Love Live!
08. Tantei Opera Milky Holmes

There are some which are games but not animes so I won't get to watch or know the story then. And since I don't play games too. Maybe a little pity since there's this one that catch my eye called Touken Ranbu 刀剣乱舞. Okay, maybe it's the costumes and art that look attractive to me. But they do look a little interesting. Argh, can someone just buy me a game console to play this? lol.


I'm getting too much into the mood of Japanese stuffs lately. (^_^;) It wasn't any big deal though. I was shopping at Daiso once more since I happened to walk pass it. Although the stuffs there are always the same I'm usually going there to buy some necessities. But this time I was just walking around and I can't believe I've spotted the Kanji book that I've been waiting for a long time!!! （・□・；）It just appears before my eyes and that was the ONLY one I wanted for a very long time that is missing in my set.

JUST TELL ME IS THIS MEANT TO BE FOR ME AND THAT I HAVE TO STUDY HARD NOW!

Although yes I admit I'm a little guilty of not touching my Kanji book for a while. I always think that grammar or vocab is more important so I've been focusing on these 2. But my Kanji isn't that good so it makes reading a little tough for me. And that's why all the more I shouldn't put this aside since this new book came. >_<  Oh wow and time sure flies fast that I have the 3 books for a year already I should probably go through them all soon. Anyway I've also bought 2 small Japanese motivational books and I could read quite a bit. Yes, shall practise my Kanji well enough until I can read them with ease!

Oh and also, I couldn't stop myself from buying those 和風 Japanese style stickers. They just look too pretty I had to get those!! And such stuffs remind me of Kagrra, so much I have to get them in my hands. (´๑•_•๑) I can't make myself regret!!


Let me be able to look back with pride..

My Anime list ~June 2015

I'm trying to clear those animes that are on my list previously, but somehow I ended up watching whichever ones that I feel like it at that point of time..Well, usually are the ones that I find them out by myself. Ahh...never mind. Let's see those that I've completed thus far: 

01. Corpse party: Tortured souls コープスパーティー [OVA 4 episodes] → This horror story ended kinda too fast that I could completed it in a matter of 2 days [or nights since I'm only free at night lol], in which I was actually expecting more from a horror one this time. lol~~
Maybe it was quite a wrong decision to watch a horror anime at night but I just have the mood to watch something like that exciting. It didn't affect my sleep though. (≧▽≦) So to say, I'm more disgusted at the violence of how the characters died in it...intestines, tongues and eyeballs, and so much blood. Luckily I wasn't eating anything at that time. lol. It's the sounds that can make you feel disgusted. The screams is actually not as annoying as any others that goes "iiyyyaaaaaa!!!" so I'm kinda surprised! Probably this one is better as a game than an anime, since there isn't much to the story. The ending is kinda bad since it left me hanging there, not understanding why the male classmate have both his arms got chopped off and still holding on to the 2 girls' hands. Creepy enough. lol. Still, it's something you can watch if you wanna feel disgusted. (´へεへ`*)

02. Noucome のうコメ [10 episodes + OVA] → Oh my goodness, I actually went back to comedy romance anime again right after the watching the above scary one. lol. Noucome does seem funny at the start, and it's talking about having to make choices all the time in your life. But it gets pretty nonsensical. The introduction at the first episode is really long that I had to skip that. And the OVA is really so nonsense that I'm not satisfied with watching it. (ノ-_-)ノ~┻━┻
SO the anime is better, but it has too much fan service that I do get a little annoyed. lol. Therefore the best thing about this anime I would say is to see Kanade do stupid things in front of everyone at random times and be labelled as a pervert. That's all. LOL!

03. Maid-sama! 会長はメイド様! [26 episodes + 2 OVA episodes] → This romance comedy anime is really good! The story goes on really nice and has a good ending, but feels like there's also more to it and the story just isn't over yet. I supposed there's already a Season 2 out there already? By far it's the only romance anime that I like most and the most impressed with. I enjoyed every single episode I don't know why it made me love it so much better than any other romance comedy ones I've watched. Best imo. (*'▽'*)

Some pics of it I just wanna show~~

I have no idea that Urusai can be in the that Kanji! (ﾟOﾟ)

I like how cute and annoying Usui appears sometimes. xD I love such randomness that made me laughed.

And the romantic part~~ 

Who doesn't love a pat on the head. (♥ŐωŐ♥)

What's with cats appearing in most of the animes? lol~

Probably Usui is the best male character I've ever seen in terms of all the qualities he possessed, and he has such a great voice! I don't know if I'll start watching those animes cos of the voice actor lol, but this anime character is indeed like the most perfect guy ever! This anime is too good! It's gonna make me compare guys with Usui. Gosh, how can anyone have such a great charm like him. Misaki is so fortunate. lol~ (☆∀☆)

04. Noragami ノラガミ [12 episodes + 2 OVA episodes] → I completed this anime within 2 days!! It's another awesome one and so addictive. Can't believe this supernatural anime got into me. It made me smile so much and also cried at the later episodes where it's really touching! This anime can be a little scary but it doesn't bother me that much. It really has a very great story plot about kami-sama and shinki. I'm really amazed at the whole development. And it has a super good ending. YES the BEST ending ever you can expect. ヾ(*´∀｀*)ﾉ

There isn't a romance between the main 2 characters although more or less they have some feelings for each other, which is also a nice thing to me. Yato looks really cool as a god, and Yukine is such a cute boy I can't resist either! xD Somehow I think it might be good if there's a love story going on between either of the 2 guys with Hiyori. Might be something really interesting. (^_-)-☆


And there, a cat appears in this anime too. lol.

That's it! So for the whole of June I'm done with 4 animes! I supposed this is good if I keep track of my progress every month. haha. But I've stopped Mōryō no Hako 魍魎の匣 in which is one that I'm supposed to carry on watching >_< Now I'm just gonna left it hanging there and ended up on my pending/to-watch list? Oh gosh... Now I'm in search for another one that interest me, in which the list are probably of no use now. (x_x) Well well..... Shall let things be so long as I learn something from a good show and write my thoughts like this as usual. It should be a stress-free leisure for me. Haha.


Anime all the way~~!! (-^〇^-)

Let me end my uneasiness...

Some things just keep boiling inside my heart.

I know I felt uncomfortable at some point but also relieved as well. When I see how happy they are...without me.

No, none of them contacted me. I was wondering if I'm considered as being part of their life at all. But of course, it seems, not anymore.

Maybe it's my fault since I used to forced myself to fit into the group, because I wanna feel I belong there...somewhere. But I knew, something is wrong since I feel uneasy instead. It's hard for me to do anything nor get any attention.


Now that I'm out of them, I do get it... We are in different worlds, afterall. That's not where I belong.


I know I shouldn't be bothered by such feelings again every time I see their photos without me, but somehow, doesn't it hurt to know that I probably don't mean a thing after all?

Or the period of time that we've been together is just too short for a friendship to build up good among us?

And so, I wasn't needed in their life anymore. Not even a bit.


Should I feel sad? I have no idea. It's somewhat an unexplainable feeling... I'm in fact glad that I need not force myself too much to be in a place where I don't belong. And yet, they probably never noticed.

Can I say that their happiness is fake? I'm not even sure how long can they be together... I'm even doubting them. Because they all got too close too soon.

It's gonna be a year very soon. And to think that this is how it turned out, that they are out my life too.


Although given me a choice again I might not choose the same route, but still it's a pity... how relations between some people have to be this way.


How important was I in their lives? I won't ever know the answer.

At least I experienced some things that I made me grow and learn a lot. One of it is that you shouldn't take anyone's words seriously. Well for some people their words aren't dependable and they're always saying for the sake of saying it. But I'm tired of such a fake relationship too.

Why can't you be truthful to me? I'm not like anyone... I've helped you so much, although I depended on you once back then, but yet.... >_<


Probably it's really time to end the disappointment.


I've already tried my best. Let me end my uneasiness... since I've got what you mean.


さようなら, if we ever meet again, I wonder how it'll be like.

Maybe total strangers? Because I would forget easily.... Well, sad truth.

I need to feel better~

Haven't been posting a whole lot of food photos for some time! lol. Well, then again it's Japanese food post afterall. xD

A time to treat myself and my friend over the weekend since it's been a while. But that also goes my money I have spent so much on that day itself on other stuffs too. lol. Nevertheless, I had a long and fulfilling day that made me feel lotta better~ (^ε^)

It's the first time I'm stepping into Chabuton since I wanted to have some ramen but then they don't really have a lot of stuff in their menu. It feels kinda uncomfortable without a lot of choices to make from. lol. But we still settle for it since it's quite spacious and quiet that day. =)

I'm in fact much more satisfied with the salad and the gyoza more than anything else. Lol.

The ramen is just okay to me. lol. I don't know if that most ramen has to make you get sick of the soup soon, I wasn't that impressed but at least it isn't as oily as some ramen shops since you can request for less oil. At least this bowl can make you feel full.

Since we had such a late lunch, moments later we went to Wild Honey for a cake rather than a proper dinner. Lol. The environment is pretty nice for a long chat. 

Orange Chiffon cake~~ Anything chocolate just makes me happy. hahaha. (^o^)

This hot chocolate has a taste that I never had before!! I don't know if it's cos it's thick but I really wondered why the special taste. I enjoyed it, cos it made me feel sleepy soon after. lol!! But really nice, I had such a nice weekend even though I didn't walk around much.


There goes, I wonder in what way have I been pampering myself at.. Is it just food, really?

I wished I could do more...

7th lyric release - Requiem of rain

It's probably the hottest time of the year now in June, but then the weather has changed again and it's been rainy, which made my mood better now. (^_^) Have been feeling a little unwell few days back when it was really hot and how much I was hoping for the rain to come. lol. And so, I intended to post a rainy song of mine...hoping to make myself feel better. But anyways, let me just stick to it then, although I'm in a better condition now. (-｡-;)

[Inspired by BUCK-TICK Nocturne -Rain Song-]

Requiem of rain
Light flashes of profound memories,
the world shaken into ruins
Love has turned into destruction

Rain lightly tapping on my heart
To whom is the requiem playing for?

*Can hatred travel at the speed I couldn't catch up?
Darkness convinced me that it is in my eyes
The last bit of me has even given up
I don't want to dream, I don't want to wish
it's not coming

La~ la~ 

Devils crying for souls in despair
seemingly eating into my beliefs
I couldn't even spare myself off

Ripples attract and lead me to here
To whom is this requiem playing for? 

*Can hatred travel at the speed I couldn't catch up?
Darkness convinced me that it is in my eyes
The last bit of me has even given up
I don't want to dream, I don't want to wish
it's not coming

La~ la~

The only thing that spoke of our love,
is falling just like this rain

~~~~~
Rain made me feel calm and peaceful now instead of gloomy back then. I really wish it will continue to fall. 

Although the coldness may be hard to bear with. 

Just let the rain wash my worries away~~  

~~Yuuka 

My purchases ~May 2015

Did a little shopping last month but gosh I'm feeling it wasn't enough!! (*´з｀*)ﾉ

The great thing is that I finally found a lip balm that has a nice sweet colour and yet it doesn't have the menthol sensation! Thank goodness! Although it's really creamy but I can feel it moisturizes my lips better than the Maybelline lip gloss which always dries up my lips!! I love the colour of the gloss too but it's a pity that it made me uncomfortable each time I used it. =( I began to think that lip stick/lip gloss are probably not for me. A little sad though..but I've happy with my new-found love. lol.

I've dumped away some hand creams that reminds me of unhappy times. Lol.. Wonder if there is such a thing but yes, there are smells will remind me of those times when I used it. I hated them and since I've stopped using them, might as well throw or give them away. Anyway I'm glad I got this new hand cream as a gift at the right time when I need it! Touching so much paper everyday is seriously drying up my hands so much, not to mention that I have paper cuts every now and then so it's definitely a need for me to take care of my precious hands now. haha.

3 more new products bought but I've not started using them yet! Good grief, got them cos of sales. lol. I think it's always good to stock up some stuffs first cos whenever you need to get something cos you ran out of it, you usually can't find them! What a cruel reality. xD  I shall evaluate them some time later then. And this will be my first CC cream! I'm excited since it's a Japan product! Hope it's much better than the BB cream I'm currently using. Hahaha. [No idea when will I even try a DD cream =p]

Got this hip hugger cos supposedly that it'll be useful for me much better than a belt. Since there's always been the problem of wearing pants that are loose at the back. Somehow, it didn't turn out the way that I thought of it to be. Maybe it depends on the pants that I'm wearing. Well well... I'll see. I hope it's something I can really continue using it for a very long time. lol.


Next, I still wanna do more shopping!! My to-buy list is still there~~~ xD

Kagrra,'s day - 03 June

I'm touched that on this very day, Nao tweets about his blog post on Kagrra,'s day.

I don't remember seeing Nao having such a long blog post about Kagrra, and indeed [since I went to look up at it too] it's the first time he typed so much about Kagrra on this day. I guess throughout these 4 years it's all been building up in his heart, so he really feel that he should talk about it now.

I was reading really slowly to understand what Nao is saying. It's probably a day where he is thankful for? And it's a proud thing for him that the 5 of them can go on as Kagrra, with the support of Gurrakos, and so we are treasures to them! At the last live performance, Nao doesn't want to show us his crying face at the end of the live, and so he only cried after that. He even mentioned at the start of his first solo, it was tough since he hasn't played the bass for a year. O_O

After that, I couldn't quite get the second part of the post, but I supposed he was saying he might feel that isshi would be laughing at him, asking him "What are you doing, Nao-ran!" Lol. Well, and 03 June is always a day that he cherish, he hopes that he can convey Kagrra,'s memories and that we can feel the soul of their songs.

He is also grateful to have met everyone.

And it ended with Nao laughing how young he was back then.  (-^〇^-)


You see, it's such a touching post. ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡ Only Nao can make me feel good so far. Wished that the other members feel the same and also be posting something like that too.

Because we still have Nao-ran, I will always be remembering those special days too.

I will never forget how you guys make me feel how beautiful this world is with your music. We are definitely in the same world. 

Thank you so much, Nao-ran... my favourite isshi, and all Kagrra, members.

We will all cherish our days and memories together.. till we see isshi.

Happy Kagrra, day, always.

Exfoliate your skin!

It was quite a right time when I see this news article on exfoliating the skin that reminded me I have not done it for a super long time!!

Can anyone believe it? That the exfoliator I have now was bought 2 years ago? It's really bad of me to keep it this long and not using it that often. I know it was recommended that we should use it at least once a week , but I don't like rubbing my skin like that most of the time. I only feel like exfolitating my skin whenever I saw dead skin appearing although it might be a little too late then. [cos I'll look ugly when I have my foundation on lol] And not forgetting to mention, my skin will feel super dry right after that and I hate that feeling!! Which is why I prefer to put on my facial mask and do so diligently once a week. (≧ω≦) Well well, but this week I really did exfoliate cos I can't stand the sight of dead skin appeared before my eyes. O_O

It's actually better to exfoliate regularly so that your skin will be able to breathe properly and enhance the absorption of the skincare products. It can make your skin fairer, reduce acne and control oil production.

And there it goes further to talk about AHA and BHA type of exfoliator in which I'm not familiar with. I have no idea if mine contains the ingredients and I don't usually look at it, so long as it works for me when I used the product. And do I really have to purposely find for such an exfoliator the next time? lol. Duh, seems like I don't have much knowledge about exfoliators but it's okay.. I just have to continue using it and more regularly since it does have benefits to the skin. Yeah, then again, we can't be lazy when it comes to skincare. >_<

But no way am I going do the DIY recipe for it! lol~


ごめん、I am still kinda lazy~~ xD

Happy 15th anniversary to my Kagrra,-sama♥

It's the 3rd of June! Once again, I made a collage for Kagrra,.

This time I did with 5 pictures and 5 hearts. This year, the number 5 became a special number to me. My birthday month in May has got to be the most special time that I ever have, receiving so many well wishes and surrounded by so many people. And I published my lyric 雨月 also means the fifth lunar month. This probably is all too coincidental. lol. But things just happens at the right time isn't it? I didn't expect it to be that meaningful to me.

And to add on more, Kagrra, has 5 members. lol. xD 

Well it's the year 2015 anyway. hahaha. 

I remember my old post on this very day on how thankful I was that Kagrra, formed. I am feeling the same now. But reading them back makes me feel, 'Wow it seemed so long ago cos I couldn't remember those are the things that I've written back then. Many things must have happened that I couldn't recall!' But on the other hand, I feel I have grown, because of all those. I've became better and better. I can be more assured of myself. And so I can be standing at where I am now.

Isshi is most probably up there smiling happily on this day too. Because Kagrra, is the best thing that has ever existed in this life.

Thank you, my beloved Kagrra, -sama. My love for you never dies. (*˙︶˙*) ♡

いつまでも恋する。

私に見守ってください。

かしこ、
ゆうか

Being lonely?

A topic that I didn't want to broach on, but it was after I've watched Rent-a-cat movie on tv that gets me thinking about it.

I have even talked about it to a friend of mine, how much I don't like to hear the word lonely and that I have been asked this question quite often "Are you lonely?" I just don't get why..

Why is that being alone sums up as being lonely? (-_-)


Maybe it's because I'm too used to be alone that I don't feel it or find this a problem? I don't know!! I really don't know how does loneliness feel. I just find the word lonely to be of a negative meaning, more like being pitiful and miserable that no one will know even if you are dead and so I don't like to hear it. And how is it that I look like that to some people?  I have no idea.... (x_x)

I don't find being alone a problem since I can be in my own world, I can do whatever I want... I need not surround myself with people whom I have to please. Sometimes it can be so tiring to have people around that you have to bother about them so often......

Yet, there are times where people think I'm independent cos I'm alone. U know what, I'm just amused at how many different people thinks of me, and this can be so annoying. Well well, there are just people around who like to say things in front of other people and you have no idea what are their thoughts based on.... ⋋_⋌

Humans are just annoying, cats aren't isn't it? Maybe I was poisoned by this show. I'll rather be surrounded by cats. Lol.


I really thought the word lonely is a taboo for me, until I just recalled that I've used this word before in my lyric work!! LOL, can I just laugh at myself somehow. There are always things that I done without realizing it...

Now that I look back at my lyric, 留別 Ryuubetsu was actually such a lonely song. Argghhh.. I really wished I can stopped using this word. It doesn't feel that good. But my song seems to be at that topic.. and I feel I wrote it well, didn't I?  But why....why should such a thing even exist?  What I couldn't take it is that upon watching the movie, I can't believe how Japanese people can say out the word "寂しい" [= lonely] so easily!!  I don't know why but I just feel uncomfortable to hear that from anyone, cos it made me feel this world is so cruel. HOW CAN THIS HAPPEN. NO ONE SHOULD BE LEFT FEELING THIS WAY!

I might be getting a little worked up but why should this be how the real life is?


Really, I don't like anyone to use that word so easily... it probably indicates that you want someone to be with you, but instead it made me feel this world is cruel I don't want to hear. It's as though no one is gonna care for anyone....anymore. (T_T)

Although I can't avoid it from happening but I would still like to avoid the word.

Just let me be out of the cruel truth. It doesn't exist in my world. 



Please, don't make yourself feel lonely. And don't say that.


寂しい一人～ネコ貸します。

Anything for now~

A little news that I came across last week. I'm kinda dumbfounded... how is that Namie's song Anything be implying about the contract issued she had with her previous company? Pretty much almost every news is like that. They'll always assume it means something negative when a celebrity did or release something. Lol.

Whether or not, I don't really put much thoughts to this since I just enjoy her songs. I supposed this is a motivating and positive song so let's just enjoy it? And this seem to me not really worth to publish as a news. What a waste. (¬_¬)


Well, anyway it's a holiday for me today but I couldn't get to sleep since the weather has been so hot! I've tried watching animes for the past few days with few episodes at one go but somehow I do get the exhaustion. Why why? I'm just watching for entertainment purpose, yet I feel tired pretty much easily I had to stop. I couldn't keep staring at the screen for too long. I have to do something else. Argh, and so there goes the weekend. Just busy cleaning and clearing my stuffs again. (x_x)


Now that it's June I hope things gets better. And the exhaustion doesn't get too much over me. Okay, maybe I'm just lacking of quality sleep that's why. The weather has to turn good again and so my composing spirit can be back with good works. I wonder how this month will be going but I'm pretty sure I'll be in busy mode. Let me have energy for everything else.


yeah, Anything for now~ I'm not in much of a mood.  (,_,)